100
by GooooodPie
Summary: 100 one-shots some short, some long, revolving around our four favorite zombie killers. Columbus/Tallahassee. Rated M for various things.
1. Introduction

Hello Fanfiction! Wow, its been so long since I've posted anything! Well, I'm back so ja. Uh, this chapter is...well it's just basically a short and quick chapter to get this thing started.

So, my plan is to write 100 Z-Land one-shots, but if I reach that limit and decided to do more one-shots I'll probably just change the title to Infinite and the summary so it maches and we'll see.

Woah, so like nobody told me that the first chapter of this story was kind of messed up. T.T But I just noticed and have hopefully fixed it!

Disclaimer: I own nothing, if I did there would be more slash.

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1: Introduction

From his side of the Hummer, Columbus gazed at a map they had picked up. As he followed the road they were on, tracing it with his finger, he suddenly stopped. The road lead to Texarkana before breaking into two. One going North, the other one further South.

He remembered the first time he'd met Tallahassee. Needless to say his introduction was rather memorable.

"_Here's the deal Columbus, I'm not easy to get along with and I'm sensing you're a bit of a bitch so, uh, I give this relationship to about Texarkana."_

Columbus sighed and folded up the map, opting to stare out the window. Whatever happened in Texarkana happened. That's just the way it was.

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Yes, it was extremely short, but no matter! The other ones are longer, like way longer. Just look at Chapter 15. But I digress.

Anyway, drop me a line if you liked it or if you didn't like it. I love to hear everyone's opinions!

~Kara


	2. Love

Ah ha! Here's Chapter 2 of my 100 Themes! Yep, so I hope you guys enjoy it!

Disclaimer: I don't own anything Zombieland related, though I really wish I did...

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**2: Love**

Columbus had never been in love before. He had crushes, but had ignored them, knowing they would never like him back.

He had thought he was in love with Wichita when he first met her, until he kissed her at Pacific Playland. He hadn't felt anything but awkwardness. After the kiss they had quickly agreed that they felt more of a sibling love than anything else.

It was when he had found Tallahassee tearing apart the store looking for Twinkies that he'd figured it out. He liked Tallahassee.

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**

"God damn spit-fuck move!" Tallahassee yelled at me, but I was frozen. The zombie was a little girl, no older than four, and was running towards me at full speed. I knew I should have either been running away or shooting her, but I couldn't do either.

She was so close that I could see her crazed blue eyes. "Columbus!" Tallahassee's yelling finally snapped me out of the zone I was in and without thinking I lifted up my double-barrel by the end and swung. I lopped the girls head clean off and it went flying before splattering against a wall.

I threw up on the spot. I couldn't believe I did that to a little girl, she may have been a zombie but still. Another round of bile made it up my throat and I didn't attempt to stop it. More vomit joined what was already on the floor.

By then I was shaky and would have fallen into my own spew if it hadn't been for Tallahassee holding me up.

"Ohio, hey kid you ok?" I wanted to scream, fight, or do anything but I didn't have the energy. Instead I just leaned my head back, enjoying the warmth and safety that Tallahassee gave me and fell into a nightmare induced sleep.

When I woke up I was in the front seat of the Hummer. We were parked in the middle of nowhere and looking back I noticed Wichita and Little Rock sleeping, but no Tallahassee. I stretched and deciding I needed air got out of the car.

I was standing there enjoying the air when I hand clamped down on my shoulder. Oh why had I forgot my double-barrel in the Hummer?

"Nice to see ya up spit-fuck." I relaxed but didn't say anything. I was more than a little surprised when he handed me a bottle of water. "Ya might wanna get the taste of vomit outta your mouth right?" I nodded and accepted the water, which felt good running down my throat.

I was handing him the water back when the little girl flashed through my head again, and I made a quick split second decision. I grabbed Tallahassee and kissed him. He didn't react and I pulled away.

"S-Sorry, I know you probably don't like me that way and if you want to him me now I totally under-" I was caught off by Tallahassee grabbing me and slamming our lips together. To say I was caught off guard didn't cover it, but ah hell who knew Florida was **that** skilled with his tongue.

Our little moment was cut off by a wolf whistle and we pulled back to see Wichita and Little Rock sticking their heads out of the Hummer, huge grins on their faces. I turned crimson and buried my head in Tallahassee's snakeskin jacket while he yelled something at the girls that made me blush a deeper shade of red if that was possible.

Of all the people to fall in love with why did it have to be him?!

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Meh...I feel like I messed up badly on that ending but who knows... Anyway tell me what you think, I'd love to hear anything. Especially how to make them seem more in character, they kinda seem OOC.


	3. Light

Whoo, I had a bit of trouble getting this one uploaded, but here it is! Uh...sorry it's kinda sloppy and vague and I feel terrible for uploading something like this but I really didn't have much inspiration or time to write this one so here it is!

Also! I would like to give thanks to **I'm Gay For Robots **and **Ariel Lazarus **for favoriting this story, and an extra special thanks to **Moriko Csove Doyle** for adding this story to their alerts!

Now for the disclaimer: I don't own anything Zombieland-ish. Nope not one thing. T.T

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Chapter 3: Light

In the time before the zombie apocalypse light was good. Light meant you could see at night while doing research papers or unfinished homework. It meant you could stay up late longer figuring out ways to con people. It meant you were able to take care of your loved ones better.

But it was taken for granted, as all things are in life. And it wasn't until the United States of Zombieland came to power that people, whoever was left, noticed it.

Instead of light being comforting and safe, it was dangerous. Zombies were attracted to light in hopes of any alive survivors that they might find. Light also gave you away to any nearby zombies at night

But in a way, light was the only thing that kept you going. You struggled to live just to see the next morning when the sun would come up. And in those times the world didn't seem so fucked over. It was almost peaceful.

But with four survivors of the zombie apocalypse that was the keyword, "almost".

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This one was rather short, but don't fear, the next one is most definately longer! Though I do think it's pretty sad that this story is on it's third chapter (though they have been rather short) and I still don't have one review. Sad face.


	4. Dark

I updated this one a bit late today whoops. Anyway here's chapter 4! It's longer than my previous ones and has angst if you squint. It also has some Columbus/Tallahassee, but revolves around Little Rock!

Also! I would like to thank **EmilyTheCutestEvilDeadGirl** (awesome and creepy name, love it) for alerting, **Cerberuskillz** (another cool name) for favoriting and my special thanks goes to **Anyminutenow** who gave me way more credit than I deserve.

Disclaimer: I don't own Z-Land.

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4: Dark

After their adventure at Pacific Playland, Little Rock was scared of the dark. Every sound made her jump and she could rarely sleep. It was on one of those nights that she decided she needed some air. Taking up her pistol she stealthily walked to the kitchen. A noise from the far side of the room made her turn that direction while backing up slowly.

Though while Little Rock was backing up she ran into something. Slowly reaching her hand behind her she squeezed whatever was behind her causing the mysterious object to let out a rather loud squeak. A very familiar squeak.

Little Rock spun around. "Columbus!" Though it wasn't just Columbus, it was Columbus and Tallahassee in a very compromising position. And by compromising she meant Columbus had his hands under Florida's shirt while said redneck had one hand down Ohio's pants and another one in his hair.

There was an awkward silence as the two males detached themselves from one another and Tallahassee muttered something to Columbus making the younger boy blush, before the older man left.

"Ah, so, uh…couldn't sleep?" Columbus asked nervously.

Little Rock nodded before blurting out the question that had been on her mind. "Are you and Tallahassee fuck buddies or like an actual couple?"

Instead of getting flustered or panicking like she thought he was going to Ohio just sighed. "I-I don't really know." There was something sad in the way he said it, but as quickly as it came it went. "So why can't you sleep?"

Little Rock fidgeted a bit before answering. "I'm scared of the dark, I mean I wasn't before but ever since Pacific Playland…" Columbus did say anything he just gave her a hug.

"So uh, you wanna sleep with me tonight?" He asked after a couple of seconds. Little Rock just nodded and followed Columbus to the nearby couch where there was a blanket on the floor. He sat on the couch and draped the blanket over the both of them.

"Now what?" She asked rather confused to Ohio's plan.

"Well I've got watch, so you sleep while I stay up." Little Rock looked uncertain. "Don't worry, I'll be up so nothing will happen, I promise." Little Rock snuggled next to Columbus and closed her eyes. In those seconds the darkness didn't seem so terrifying, and within minutes she was asleep.

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Tallahassee seems kinda OOC along with Columbus...hm...I must watch Z-Land again. Anyway, drop a line, tell me what you thought. This chapter is a bit longer than last time, by like double the words, so I hope it appeases all of you out there reading this Fanfic.

Ah, an important note! _There will _probably_ be NO updates tomorrow!!!_ Why? Because I have an extremely lame-o TAKS (Texas Assessment of Knowledge and Skill) test. It's an English test. If anything I'll be writing for another Z-Land Fanfic (it's not up yet) and making the best effing doodle that will canvas my arm if they don't let me write.

Uh...I think that's it. Yep, that's it! See ya maybe tomorrow but if not then I'll have two chapters released on Thursday, so stay tuned!

-insert Pokemon to be continued here-


	5. Comfort

Hello everybody! Sorry I'm so late getting this one out, I had a bit of a writer's block problem, but I was able to overcome it and now here is the next chapter! As you can clearly see it is much longer than my others ones, none of them totalled 1,000 words while this one is 2,379 (not including all the stuff I'm adding up here.

Thanks: I would like to thank the people who _alerted_ and _favorited_ this story: **Tubular Fox** (makes me think of a really cool surfing fox), **A Kiss for A Kill**, **saint2sinners** (I really wanted to be distracted and play Dante's Inferno after I read your name), **DoomsdayZombie** (it's like saying zombie apocalypse but more creative), and **Circinus **(reminds me of citrus and circus so I really wanted to have an orange and see some pretty circus lights).

Reviewers: And I give a big thanks to my fabulous reviewers: **A Kiss for A Kill**, **Anyminutenow**, **EmilyTheCutestEvilDeadGirl**, and **Ariel Lazarus**.

Uh yeah about this chapter, there are multiple line breaks but that's just where one segment ends and another one begins. Also I've got footnotes at the bottom so ja.

Disclaimer: Don't own anything and no, I'm not making a profit.

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5: Seeking Solace

Comfort was never Tallahassee's strong point. His was being an ass-kicking zombie killer.

Comfort was never Little Rock's strong point. Sure, she could comfort people, but in a somewhat blunt yet vague way.

Comfort was most definitely **not** Columbus's strong point. If anything he made it worse because he never knew what to say, and to many people this made him seem more insensitive than anything.

Comfort, because it couldn't be left to anybody else, ended up being one of Wichita's strong points.

Tallahassee feeling down? Smack some sense into him, flirt with Columbus (which would always come back to Columbus in the end), or find him some big guns.

Little Rock in the dumps? Candy, jokes, and getting her to steal Columbus from Tallahassee (something she enjoyed doing quite thoroughly) were the best ones to cheer her up.

Columbus being depressed though? That's a whole other zombie infested ballpark.

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**

Wichita was observing her younger sister quite closely, she seemed…off somehow. Her smile was a bit too big and her laughter sounded fake. Also, she kept constantly staring at the ground like a child that was getting reprimanded for having a cookie before dinner.

It was starting to trouble Wichita. So, she went to her first tactic: Candy and Jokes.

"Hey Little Rock, want some Jolly Ranchers?" She asked her sister. The younger girl shook her head. "Come on their ranchers that'll make you jolly." She joked. Yes, she knew it was a terrible pun but it normally at least made her sister laugh.

"No thanks sis, I'm not in the mood." She left after that leaving me dumbfounded on the couch. She didn't want candy or even laugh at my terrible jokes! This must have been something major.

Later that night, she tried again by noticing things sort of getting hot between Columbus and Tallahassee. Wichita leaned over to her sister "Hey want to steal Ohio from Florida?"

Instead of a devilish smirk and excitement peering through like it normally would though, Little Rock's face stayed the same and she just sighed instead.

"I'm cool, I really don't think I want too." She said before heading to the room that the two girls were sharing. Wichita stayed though, just staring at the table until she heard rather sultry noises coming from the couch. It was then that she also snuck away to their room.

Once inside she shut the door quietly and turned her attention to Little Rock who was in her bed, gun clutched close to her chest.

"You asleep?" Wichita saw Little Rock shake her head.

"I-I'm fine." Something didn't sound right. She sat down at the foot of her sister's bed.

"You don't sound fine, tell me what's wrong."

Little Rock sat up and pulled her knees close to her chest. "It was five years ago from today. Y-You remember your dog, the one I told you ran away? Well, I lied. He didn't run away I sold him to some guy for one-hundred bucks. I-I'm sorry."

Wichita stared at her sister. "That's what you were worried about?" Little Rock nodded. "You dork, why would I worry about something like that now? Money doesn't even matter anymore."

"But I felt so guilty seeing the look on your face!" Wichita giggled.

"So? Look Little time passes, I'd forgotten about that dog till now."

"So you forgive me?" Wichita paused and gave Little Rock a thoughtful face.

"I don't know, after all you hurt my feelings by not accepting my candy, or laughing at my bad jokes. In fact, you didn't pull Columbus away from Tallahassee so I'm not sitting or putting anything of mine on that couch tomorrow. So I guess…" There was a long length of silence that made Little Rock squirm. "I guess I can forgive you."

Little Rock tackled Wichita in a great big bear hug. "Thanks Wichita!" Wichita just smiled and hugged back. After all what were sisters for?

**

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**

Tallahassee was a big problem when it came to comforting him. Though most of the time he would just fuck Columbus, and that in itself seemed to take care of the problem.

But there was always the problem of what happened when Columbus got injured or sick. When that happened there was nothing anybody could do. Tallahassee would either: stay up all night beside the boy keeping watch, pace nervously for hours on end while muttering under his breath, or clean his guns and knives over and over and over again.

And it just happened to be one of those days.

It had been a complete and total accident to being with. It wasn't supposed to happen, and yet it did. What was ironic about it was that it was one of Columbus's famous rules being broken that led to this. What made it even worse it was Rule 2: Double Tap.

Like most times, Florida had gotten too cocky and forgotten to shoot a zombie in the head after it went down. But normally, when Tallahassee brought zombies down they stayed down, double tap or not. One of them decided that they didn't like that routine.

Tallahassee had left a gun, thankfully it was only a pistol, by that zombie. And honestly, who knew that they could still somehow fire the damn thing?!

Nobody, apparently, because as Columbus came around to the isle that Tallahassee was in the zombie had fired. Zombies though have terrible aim, so it only caught Columbus in the shoulder. But because he was such a "skinny little spit-fuck", the shot was enough to send the smaller boy flying backwards.

At the cry that Ohio had given from being shot, Tallahassee turned and opened fired on the zombie, turning Double Tap into 'That-Fuckers-Brains-Are-All-Over-The-Floor-So-I'm-Pretty-Sure-He's-Dead' Tap.

Following that he hurried to where Columbus was bleeding over the grocery store floor muttering something about "God damn it, fucking zombie, fucking gun." and "I don't feel good, I think I'm going to be sick." Before alternating back to "Where did a zombie get a stupid gun? Who gives a zombie a gun anyway?"

This continued all the way from when Tallahassee picked Columbus up to when he was yelling at Wichita to "Get the car ready because the kid just had an accident and needs some place safe to rest now!" Before jumping in the back of the Hummer with Columbus; and as soon as the door closed, tried to find something to help stop the bleeding.

By the time they had secured a safe house and gotten Columbus inside he wasn't doing anything except shiver lightly every once in a while.

This entire situation had driven Tallahassee to keep out of where the kid was and was now sharpening knives and cleaning guns.

"Wichita? Is Columbus going to be ok?" Wichita seemed to stare off into space as she answered.

"Yeah, he'll be fine. Ohio may seem weak but he's tough."

"Do ya really believe that?" Wichita nearly jumped at Tallahassee's voice, which unlike normally held a bitter and angry tone.

"Of course I do! He'll be fine, you of all people should know that."

Suddenly the hick was towering over her. "Yeah I should, but me of all fuckin' people put him that way!"

Tallahassee turned away and there was silence in the little house, no one daring to speak. Florida had never blamed anyone, especially himself, for his mistakes. Now though, he was standing there looking pretty defeated.

"I couldn' protect Buck and now I can't even protect Columbus, just how fuckin' useless am I?" Wichita didn't say anything, she only gave the man a hug. It was all the comfort she could give him, the rest would have to be up to Columbus once he woke up.

**

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**

Columbus was the person that Wichita had the most trouble trying to comfort. It wasn't because he was a guy or dating their resident backwater hick. Those weren't really problems. The problem she had was when actually trying to figure out if something was wrong.

She had totally fucked up their meeting, first with tricking him and taking his beloved double-barrel, (to this day she didn't know why it was so special to him), then tricking him again, and afterwards making her quiet game comment.

It had taken Florida to tell her that what she had said was wrong before she understood it. In fact, it was only Tallahassee who knew when something seemed to be wrong with the ex-college student.

So it was quite a surprise to Wichita when Tallahassee approached her and Little Rock one day looking sort of uneasy.

"Look, Ohio's feeling down and I need your help to cheer 'im up."

"You do that fine by yourself though." Little Rock snorted and Tallahassee's face took on a mixture of amusement and some other unidentifiable emotion.

"Yeah, but I can't do that for the kid's birthday."

"Wait, how do you even know it's his birthday?" Little Rock piped up again.

At this Tallahassee took on that uneasy look again. "I kinda overheard 'im muttering about how this was gonna be another bad birthday."

"So let me guess" Wichita began "You want to give him a good birthday?" The man just rolled his eyes and shook his head.

"No, I want to give him the best birthday he's ever had." The girls nodded at this idea, and Wichita kind of guessed why Tallahassee seemed so uneasy about the whole thing. After all you never knew which birthday was going to be your last, and she bet that even he couldn't keep that thought out of his head.

"All right then, so it'll be a surprise birthday party?" It was obvious that this idea was appealing more and more to Little Rock by the second.

"You betcha! Now, here's the plan…"

As Florida was explaining his plan, Wichita had to admit it seemed like a good plan. The only problem was that she was going to have to keep Columbus distracted, never a good thing.

For one, she wasn't the best distraction for Columbus (that just happened to be the guy that was setting this whole shebang (1) up). Two, if Columbus had seemed troubled enough about this for Tallahassee to come to them it was obvious that the kid was going to do anything to stay by the redneck.

So Wichita had to come up with her own plan. This involved kidnapping Ohio (literally and thankfully Tallahassee had helped (2)) and taking him to a very XXX store to "hunt for zombies". Though it was partially for that reason and partially because she wanted to get Columbus something that would make him blush.

"Do we have to go in there? I mean who knows what could be in there?"

"What afraid some big bad zombie is in there?"

"N-No, but what if there are more of them in there than we can handle?" There was silence as Wichita thought it over, she actually hadn't thought of that before.

"Then you should get away as fast as you can." With that she pushed forward into the store. Surprisingly there weren't many zombies, maybe two or three, but not that many.

Once they had cleared the store Wichita said they were splitting up, she had to go see if they had anything "special" and she wanted Columbus to see if he wanted anything, but he firmly said he would stay put at the front.

As soon as Wichita had what she wanted, and she made sure to take a very long time looking for it, she collected Columbus and they headed back to the house.

Once there, Wichita made a huge show of pretending she heard something inside the house and that she was going around back. Columbus waited outside with his shotgun until he heard a scream from inside.

He threw the door open and readied his gun, but there was no one visible. Columbus slowly lowered his gun and snuck around, there was nothing. Finally, Columbus approached the kitchen and slowly opened the door.

"Happy Birthday Columbus!!!" Said boy in question jumped and ran out the door, making sure to slam it behind him. His breaths came out in short, quick bursts and once he had calmed himself he slowly opened the door again.

Nope, those really were Tallahassee, Little Rock, and Wichita standing behind a counter, with party hats on their heads and amused looks on their faces.

"You know Columbus, normally when people say happy birthday to someone, said person tends **not** run away." Tallahassee joked while rolling his eyes.

"He's right Ohio, just calm down and enjoy the party."

"There's no cake, but we have chips and soda!" Little Rock added.

Columbus just stood there absolutely shocked. "You guys did all this for me?"

"Hey Florida's the one who had the plan, we just followed along." Wichita couldn't help but to smile at the shocked boy's expression.

"You know Talla, you didn't have to do all this for me. It's just a birthday after all."

"That little spit-fuck is where you're wrong, because it's not just any birthday it's **your** birthday." Columbus had a big grin on his face and Wichita was sure something was about to happen, but thankfully Little Rock intervened.

"Come on guys! Let's eat, drink, and be merry! Rule 32: Enjoy the Little Things."

It was during this time that Wichita finally realized why she would never be able to offer solace to Columbus. It was because like Little Rock and her were able to comfort each other, so were Columbus and Tallahassee.

Sure, other people could try and help them, but it would never completely heal them like one another could.

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Ok so there was Chapter 5, I hope you enjoyed it (and that it was long enough)!

Footnote Time!!!

1. Yes this is surprisingly how you spell "Shebang" I didn't think it was spelled exactly like that but apparently it is. Oh in case you never heard the word it means a situation or event "When does this shebang start?" or the entirety of something "The whole shebang."

2. I'll leave this up to your imagination what happened.

So in this chapter I leave out a lot of little details, do you guys want me to turn those details into one of my one-shots? If you do, just send the detail that you want turned into a one-shot and I'll do it. Yes, I do anything and just because I don't have it posted doesn't mean I don't have it on my computer somewhere.


	6. Flight

'Ello! To all you fine fabulous people! Here's the next chapter, so I'm pretty close on track with how I'm supposed to be updating, just one more to go!

Thanks to the people from last chapter! Reviewers: **Anyminutenow** and **A Kiss For A Kill**. I'd also like to thank my one alerter **Fence Walker**.

Disclaimer: I OWN NOTHING!!!

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6: Flight

Birds had it easy. That's always what Columbus had always thought. You would see them in videos or hear about how birds were always "graceful and magnificent animals that rule the skies." Or how people wanted to be a bird because then they could "soar beautifully above the Earth." And Columbus had bought all that bullshit until now.

You see life had slowed down a lot since the zombie apocalypse started. There was no rush to classes, to go places, or really do anything. You lived from day to day and that was it. You also had time to notice a lot of things that you normally missed because you were so busy speeding through your day. Watching birds was one of them.

Columbus had taken to doing this when they had stopped in the middle of nowhere.

"Alrighty ya'll it's time for a lunch break!"

"What? No it's not, the clock says it's only noon, we normally eat at one." Little Rock protested.

"Yeah, but not only do we need a lunch break; but this car here has ta cool down. Ain't no point in driving a car now that'll overheat on you later."

It was while Tallahassee began to inform Little Rock on all other sorts of car tips that Columbus saw it. There in the distance was a Cooper Hawk. It was flying in circles and every once in a while would dive down before coming back up.

"Whacha looking at spit-fuck?" Normally Columbus would have jumped at Tallahassee's voice coming out of nowhere, though he knew he should be used to it, but he was too interested in the hawk.

"Well, I just noticed that birds aren't as graceful as everybody makes them seem. I mean look at that hawk, whenever it tried to turn or even flies straight it isn't completely graceful, if anything it looks a little bit clumsy." Tallahassee nodded at this and kept his eyes on the hawk.

The bird rose up high, before taking a sharp turn and dropping. Its wings close to its body as it hurtled towards the ground, and for a split couple of seconds it couldn't be seen. Then, there it was, rising from the ground some animal clenched in its talons.

"Woah, that was beautiful." Florida turned to look at the kid and noticed that he was looking rather adorable at the moment. Making up his mind he grabbed his scrawny spit-fuck and smashed their lips together.

"You gotta stop looking so damn adorable all the time." Tallahassee muttered while breaking the kiss before going back in for another one.

It was somewhere between that second kiss and before Tallahassee started doing amazing things with that tongue of his that Columbus thought that Tallahassee was kind of like that hawk. Sometimes he was a bit ungraceful in the things he did, but when he wanted something he went for it perfectly. But he would figure that thought out more later, right now Tallahassee was being a damn good distraction.

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Yep, this one was short, and like always I couldn't think of how to end it, but here you go.

My inspiration for this chapter was me riding on the bus and seeing a bird, and listening to Learning to Fly by The Foo Fighters.

I hope you guys enjoyed this chapter! Many more are to come!


	7. Confrontation

My second longest chapter ever! So, uh a bit of background on this chapter, it's the follow up to Dark (Ch. 4). I hope you enjoy it!

I will now give thanks to the wonderful alerters and favoriters: **ANBUGIRL1395 **(is there a space here? I couldn't tell sorry), **Moriko Csove Doyle** (your name makes me want to go read Sherlock Homes slash), and **crazysquirl** (makes me think of Izzy from TDI).

And my fabulous reviewers (If I haven't sent you a reply sorry, things have been pretty hectic but you'll get one soon promise!): **Ninny-na**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, **Moriko Csove Doyle**, and **Anyminutenow**.

Also I would like to give special thanks to **Anyminutenow**, who without them this chapter would not be possible. Like no joke, they gave me inspiration for this chapter. As such, this chapter is dedicated to you, thanks!

Disclaimer: I own nothing except my laptop which typed this up.

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7: Confrontation

Little Rock couldn't believe the people that she was traveling with. How could they be so oblivious?!

Though Tallahassee normally knew if something was up with Columbus, how did he not right now? It was obvious by him being quieter than normal and actually sitting in the front with her sister. Also, he wasn't wearing his seatbelt like he normally did.

And Wichita was oblivious too! Little Rock could clearly see her making passes at Columbus and wasn't it obvious how he was shying away that he didn't want or care for them?! After all Little Rock was a fan of 'Talumbus' as she had dubbed them (1), and wasn't looking forward to seeing Wichita destroy that. The two males were rather cute together.

Either way, she knew something would have to be done. The conversation she had with Columbus still lingered in the back of her head. She had seen that sad look and wanted to do anything to make it go away. There was only one way to do that.

She would somehow have to confront Tallahassee about his feelings for Columbus. It was a gamble. She didn't know how the older man would react and if things went south (no pun intended) she didn't want this to come back to Columbus.

It was nearly dusk when they pulled into a little town, which was only identified by a sign with the words: Millerton, Iowa – Population 48. After clearing the place out of any zombies they had found a nice secure house and turned it into a fort.

With the door, windows, and any other way into the house blocked off from the outside world they decided who would be on watch.

"Ooh I pick Tallahassee!" Little Rock cried excitedly. Finally she would have the perfect opportunity to start her interrogation.

The others stared strangely at her for a quick second, before each of them coming up with their own theory about why she wanted to be on guard duty with the redneck. Wichita agreed as long as it was the first shift; she didn't want her sister to be tired the next morning.

By the end of dinner though, Little Rock was already exhausted, not physically, but mentally. She thought that when one person liked another they could tell how they were feeling. **Apparently** she was wrong.

Both Tallahassee and Wichita were completely overlooking the simplest of signs. Columbus was obviously torn about what Little Rock and him had discussed briefly, and it almost made her wish she hadn't brought it up at all, but she knew she would have to settle it.

After all like Wichita had said, Columbus did have the guts of a guppy so there was no way he was going to do anything about it. He would probably just keep it bottled up inside until something finally snapped, and when that happened he would either end up injuring himself (which was the more likely scenario) or hurting someone else.

Little Rock wasn't going to let that happen.

That night as she sat on the couch Little Rock couldn't seem to bring herself to go over and ask Tallahassee the question. For while the man might have only been sitting a few feet away it felt as if there was such a huge rift between them. But after another thirty minutes of sitting in silence she had decided. It was time to nut up or shut up.

"Tallahassee are you and Columbus just fuck-buddies, or something more?" Florida nearly dropped his knife that he had been sharpening. After a couple seconds of him just staring at her, he finally got composed enough to talk.

"Why does it matter to you?" He said the words slowly making his southern drawl ever more noticeable.

"Oh it doesn't…but it matters to Columbus." Those were the magic words…well to make Tallahassee laugh at least.

"Come on, spit-fuck doesn't care about stuff like that."

"Tallahassee, he's got the guts of a guppy. And you know how he is about this kind of stuff. He's been troubled by this all day!" Now the man was just silent as he seemed to be contemplating something.

"Maybe I should talk to him about it." He finally muttered begrudgingly.

"No way! We both know how that's going to go. You'll probably just end up ruining your guys relationship while trying to fix it."

"And how would you assume that hm?"

"It's obvious you would say something that Columbus wouldn't understand, he would think your making fun of him and just using him as a fuck-buddy."

"And what if he was just a fuck-buddy?"

There was silence, a long and awkward pause that made everybody uncomfortable.

"Well then you better keep that to yourself. The last thing I need we need is a heartbroken Columbus who might accidentally get killed, mauled by a zombie, kill himself, or-"

Little Rock was caught off guard by Tallahassee looming menacingly over her. "Look kid just shut up, that stuff won't happen."

"You know it could."

"No it won't." Tallahassee growled. And it was then that Little Rock figured it out. It wasn't that it wouldn't happen; it was that Tallahassee wasn't even letting the thought invade his thoughts. He was denying anything would happen to Columbus because he didn't want to think anything could happen to him.

"I think you should tell him that you guys are the real deal." The words once again seemed to send the hick into shock.

"You need to confront this problem that you have with Columbus, and fix it. I can't stand to see him so mopey."

"And how exactly am I supposed ta' prove ta' him that we're the 'real deal'?"

And as if timed, right at that moment Wichita and Columbus came out of their respected rooms for their turn on guard duty.

"I have an idea." Little Rock said while flicking her gaze to her sister. She saw Tallahassee's grim face. "Come on, time to nut up or shut up right?" A big grin spread over Florida's face as he heard the familiar saying.

He breathed in deeply before moving forward, in front of Columbus and stopping in front of the smaller boy. Everybody's attention was on them. Little Rock was trying desperately not to smirk at Wichita's and Columbus' confused faces.

Then without warning Tallahassee pulled the shorter boy to him and kissed him. Little Rock let out a whoop of excitement in her head. Wichita was standing there, fury well hidden by shock. Columbus moaned and circled his arms around Tallahassee's neck as the man in question's tongue invaded Ohio's mouth.

Once their little session had ended, which resulted in a very flushed spit-fuck and a very satisfied zombie slayer, (and which came about by a more than irritated Wichita) Tallahassee and Little Rock made to their individual rooms, but not before giving a silent hi-five. Who knew confronting things was so much fun?

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Is it me or do I suck on endings? Hm...oh well! Anyway there was another fabulous chapter! Or what I hoped was fabulous, I don't know if I captured Little Rock or if she's somewhat OOC...

(1) Yes I totally got this idea from **A Kiss For A Kill**. Thanks for the inspiration!

Also big news guys! Writing this one came me and idea for a follow up on this one! My mind went exploring while I was writing this and I had to wonder how Wichita would confront Columbus during their watch. So, hopefully that'll be up soon (probably not the next one though lols).

~Kara


	8. Innocence

'Ello everybody! I had a hard time thinking of a topic for this one, but finally I got it! Anyway on to more important business!

Thanks to my alerters/favoriters: **darkhuntress13**, and **KyoSohmaLuver.**

And to my reviewers (to none of which I have replied sorry! I'm doing that right after this is posted!): **Anyminutenow**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, and **Black-Rose23**. Thanks so much guys!

Disclaimer: I own nothing except for my idea for Tallahassee Twinkies. Double the size of a normal Twinkie, with double the filling and everything.

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8: Innocence

After the first couple of kisses Tallahassee found himself wanting more of his spit-fuck.

This thought made him wonder just how far he could take it with the kid before he told him to stop. It made him wonder if the kid would ever let him go past the normal kisses they shared now. For everybody knew that Columbus and Tallahassee were anything but normal. But just being un-zombified humans in Z-Land was already unusual.

But then again, the kid was very…bitchy. Not only that and he always seemed so innocent. When he was getting beat by Little Rock or being oblivious to Wichita's advances, he was still just so innocent.

So, either way Tallahassee found himself torn between wanting to just grab the kid and make out or keep things the way they were.

This battle persisted for miles. More than once he felt the need to jump Columbus and kiss him until the boy turned into a mess. He resisted. It wasn't working out so well for him.

His rampages across the zombie infested states got worse and he got careless. Something you should never do in Zombieland. It was even in Columbus' rule book (he thought it was number 43 but he couldn't be sure)!

Either way, his carelessness was about to catch up to him. Inside a minimart no less.

It hadn't been a hard task. Go in, hunt for Twinkies, get some more food, and get out. Also, they had to kill about ten zombies. This was normally pretty easy for the four master zombie hunters…well when Tallahassee wasn't on Columbus deprivation.

Instead, he walked right into the minimart and started blasting whoever was in sight. He didn't even wait for the rest of them.

As the hick blew away zombie by zombie he forgot to check his bullet supply in his gun. Henceforth, breaking another of Columbus' rules (36: Always Watch Your Ammo) and putting himself in danger.

One zombie left, Tallahassee raised his gun and pulled the trigger. Nothing happened. The zombie hearing the click turned in his direction. She started to advance on him, taking her time and walking slowly. Black sludge poured out of her mouth as she screeched, her tongue staining her lips black as she licked them.

He glanced around to see if anything would help him, nothing in sight. He was so fucked.

"Duck!" The zombie lady sprung at him and he followed the advice (it was advice because he never took orders from anybody). A loud bang, a wailing and squelching sound, and finally a loud thump was all the hick heard.

Once everything went quiet Tallahassee turned to the advice giver. Needless to say, he wasn't shocked to see Columbus there, shotgun still raised and barrel smoking lightly. Florida then turned back to see the zombie had its long spindly white appendages in quite awkward angles. Her head was nowhere in sight, but judging from the red splatters decorating the walls floor and even a bit on the ceiling; he had a pretty good idea of where it had gone.

"You ass!" Tallahassee was a bit surprised to hear Columbus insult him, he didn't think the kid had the guts. But as he turned back around, he really wasn't surprised. The boy was literally **stomping** over to him, face red, and eyes containing an emotion the redneck hadn't seen before.

"You could have gotten yourself killed! What the hell were you thinking?!"

"That's a damn good looking box of Twinkies on that there shelf."

Total silence. Columbus let out a sigh, before turning around and starting to leave. Tallahassee didn't let him leave.

"What's wrong with you eh spit-fuck?"

Ohio whirled around and Florida was waiting for him to say something, but he didn't say anything. The ex-college student breathed in, then out, before grabbing Tallahassee and pulling him down in a bruising kiss, which soon turned into what the hick had been waiting for.

Without warning Columbus slid his tongue into Tallahassee's mouth, and after getting over the initial shock, Tallahassee responded.

He pinned Columbus to the nearby shelf and completely dominated him, not that Columbus was complaining. In fact, judging by the low moan he was guessing the kid liked it.

"Hey you guys ok in here?" Tallahassee couldn't help but growl, how was it that every time he had his bitch right where he wanted him someone always had to interrupt.

"Y-Yeah we're fine Little Rock! We'll be out soon." Came the nervous words from said boy that was obviously not fine.

"Ok well hurry up or Wichita says we're leaving without you!" They heard the footsteps leave and the sliding doors close.

"That was close." Tallahassee said as he reluctantly pulled back from Columbus.

The ex-college student didn't say anything, just nodded. In fact, now that Tallahassee looked at him, he was starting to enjoy the view more and more. The slightly mussed clothes, bruised lips, accelerated breathing, and flushed face were defiantly a turn on for the zombie slayer.

Damn. Now he wanted to do more than just make out with the kid. It also didn't help that the boy was wearing those skinny jeans. They sure did show off something very…desirable. Tallahassee turned away and resisted the urge to smack himself to get the images out of his head.

"Tallahassee? You ok?" Looking out of the corner of his eye he decided there was no way that this kid was innocent. After all the kid was bending over right in front of him. Sure it was to pick up his gun but that didn't make it any better.

"Come on you heard Little Rock, they're going to leave us if we don't get our asses in gear." Poor choice of words Columbus, very poor choice of words.

As they left Tallahassee gazed at Columbus. The boy was walking with a box of Twinkies in one hand and shotgun in the other, and Florida vaguely wondered what Columbus would do if Tallahassee decided to jump him. Probably not the best thing to try.

After all Columbus could drop his precious Twinkies and where would he be then? Without a god damn Twinkie and on suffering from Columbus deprivation again.

What Tallahassee thought was the most ironic was that he had gotten one thing from the boy and ended up craving more than he thought he would.

And as his gaze traveled lower once again Tallahassee knew there was no way he would see Columbus as innocent again. Nope, no way whatsoever.

* * *

There you go! I would like to give extra thanks to **A Kiss For A Kill** for giving me confidence that my endings don't suck as badly as I thought they did!

Also big news guys! I'm probably not going to post starting Thursday. Why? I'm headed to Japan dear readers! Yes it's a pity, but I'm hoping to keep writing on the plane and during my down time there if my parents and brother aren't breathing over my shoulder! Once I get back though it'll still be Spring Break so hopefully there will be many updates to catch up!

Anyway that's all the news I have! I hope you enjoyed my chapter and constructive criticism is always appreciated.

~Kara


	9. Truth

Woot! The final chapter in my series of follow-ups. I hope you enjoy this one as much as I enjoyed writing it!

Thanks to Alerter: **Black-Rose23**

Also thanks to my reviewers: **Anyminutenow**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, and **Black-Rose23**. I totally love your reviews guys, they make my day!

Disclaimer: I own nothing. T.T

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9: Truth

He was going to die, he was going to die, he was absolutely going to die. Then again if looks could kill, he'd probably be dead. After all Tallahassee did looks stunning after, no, wait, this isn't about him. Well, it kinda is, but it's mostly about him.

"Sit. Now." He followed the orders without hesitation. He watched as the gun was loaded, and dread built up inside of him. Oh he was toast, and not the crispy type, but the type he had last had. The type that sucked so badly and tasted like a moose (1) had sat on it.

Now she was taking a seat across from him, the gun pointed right at his head. He was attempting anything to not panic. After all, Wichita rarely missed and she would have no problem hitting him from far away.

But what if she did kill him? Then Tallahassee would probably kill her and where would that leave Little Rock? Would she kill Tallahassee or keep him around to protect her? Probably the second one, she was quite devious.

"So you and Tallahassee then?" Columbus stiffly nodded, hoping that maybe if he didn't say anything he would get away from all this unscathed.

"You know this will go a lot faster if you actually answer the questions." Wichita slid her finger over the trigger. "Got it?"

"Y-Yep!" Columbus stuttered out, this was so not looking good so far.

"Alright then…so how long have you two been sneaking around?"

"Well I wouldn't really call it sneaking around…"

Wichita's gaze froze him. "I said, how long have you two been sneaking around?"

"M-Maybe around three months?"

"And how long has Little Rock known about it?"

Columbus had to take time to think. "I'm pretty sure a week at the most."

Wichita nodded again, but didn't say anything.

"Wichita…are you mad?" The tension in the room grew, and the air seemed hot a stifling.

"Am I mad?" Wichita was staring at her gun as if she was willing it to explode. "I'm not mad, I'm fucking pissed."

Columbus flinched at the words and inhaled sharply. He knew there was going to be more to her outburst than just this.

"Do you know why I'm pissed?" Silence. "I'm pissed because the person who I thought was my best friend snuck behind my back for **three **months with another one of my friends!" Woah why did this sound like a girl drama right now?

Silence…oh shit had he said that out loud? Apparently so by the way that Wichita wasn't looking at him and was instead furiously glaring at the wall.

The silence continued for hours and as time dragged on Columbus felt more and more uncomfortable and twitchy.

"I'm sorry Wichita!" Wichita turned to him in shock.

"Sorry for what?"

"For keeping the fact that Tallahassee and I were sneaking behind your back."

Wichita just kept staring at him with a blank look. The one she got when she was trying to figure out something incredibly difficult.

"I'm not mad that you were sneaking around." She said finally with a sigh.

Columbus knew what she was doing now. She was trying to end the conversation, that's always what that sigh meant. He knew though that they were going to have to fix this if they wanted things to go back to the way that they were.

"Then what are you mad about?"

"Nothing Columbus, just leave it."

"Nope." He watched her eyes narrow as she started to finger her gun which she had put beside her some time ago. Swallowing the now existing lump in his throat he pushed on.

"You always do the same thing. Whenever there's a serious topic or something you don't want to confront you **always** just blow if off! Why can't you just tell the truth about what you're really feeling?!"

"Fine! You want to know my feelings I'll tell you my feelings!" Ohio was starting to grow nervous as Wichita stood up, gun clenched tight in her hand. "I feel betrayed and hurt and angry that two of the people who I consider family would lie to me like that! I mean at least you could have said that you were dating!"

"Wichita, about that-"

"But no! You two just had to go behind my back and what else did you two do?! No, don't tell me. I don't want to know."

"You know if-"

"And even worse my sister knew about you two! My sister! She didn't tell me either. And how in the world did she find out about your relationship? You tell her but not me that you were dating that hick?"

"I couldn't tell you anything because I didn't even know if we were dating!" Columbus' outburst had just startled Wichita. He seemed to be able to do that a lot tonight.

"How did you **not** know you were dating?" She watched the ex-college student shift on the couch and took the opportunity to sit next to him.

"We never actually said anything you know…it just started one day and I just went with it."

"You didn't ask?" Wichita knew she had hit a touchy subject when the boy flinched.

"N-No. I was worried that he'd get pissed or something and end up h-hating me." Wichita could see that Columbus was about to start crying and hugged him. Oh the kid most definitely had the guts of a guppy. After all if Tallahassee was really pissed and hated Columbus he would probably do much worse things to him.

"Wichita? Do you want to know the truth?" Wichita petted Columbus' hair as encouragement. "I think I'm in love with Tallahassee."

Wichita kept petting the boy's hair. She knew she should have been mad, or envious, or anything but she just couldn't bring herself to feel that. Actually, she felt happy for him.

"But I find myself doubting that this relationship will continue."

What in the world? Their relationship looked pretty sturdy to her if that kiss that Tallahassee had given him said anything. How could Columbus have doubts? Oh…that's right, it was **Columbus**, he had doubts about everything.

"I'm pretty sure that your relationship isn't going anywhere."

By now Columbus had pulled out of the hug and was wiping his remaining tears on his brown hoodie. "H-How do you know that?"

Wichita smiled evilly. "I've got just the idea."

The next morning everyone was rather quiet. Columbus was rather worried that the plan wouldn't work or that something bad would happen. But everything played out perfectly.

"Hey Columbus I just remembered something." Oh damn those were the words.

"What is it Wichita?" As Columbus turned around he felt something collide hard with his nose and heard a loud crack. Shit, Wichita wasn't supposed to **break** his nose.

As Ohio stumbled backwards he hit what felt like Tallahassee's chest. Apparently said redneck was yelling something, but Columbus couldn't really tell over the pain. "I'm ok Tallahassee." He tried to say but it came out sounding like "Eim okeh Talliehassie" Either way it seemed to calm the other man down. Well at least calmed down enough to kiss him.

As Tallahassee led him out to the Hummer, after miraculously fixing his nose, Columbus could help but to think that Wichita was right. Maybe the truth behind the matter was that he and Tallahassee would stay together for a long time. That alone made him grin, the same grin that got wider when the two boys were in the back of the Hummer and started making out.

After all, since everybody knew it there was no reason to hide it. That was the truth.

* * *

And there is the final chapter before I leave! I'll miss you all! Man, I'm already getting pre-flight jitters.

Anyway, I hope you all enjoyed! Be prepared to have a flood of updates from me when I get back!

(1) No offence to any moose lovers. I love them too.

Also, I was wondering if you guys wanted me to do more than just from Third-Person. Like from a P.O.V. maybe? Another thing, would you guys mind if I wrote some of these in a AU type setting, or do you want it all Zombieland? Just asking because I have some ideas.

~Kara


	10. Drive

Hello everyone! Sorry this one took so long. I had this chapter written, but when I got home I realised I hated what I had wrote and redid the entire thing. I like this version much better.

Sorry for updating so late though. I got back late Thurday, didn't go to sleep until 1:32 ish and didn't write this till today. I slept till noon, watched two movies till about like four then worked on this while doing stuff for my mom and clearing out most of my inbox.

To my fabulous reviewers! I'm sorry I haven't replied. I'm doing that as soon as I upload this. You can tell I'm really behind. I was planning to have four chapters out today, but it didn't happen. They'll hopefully be out tomorrow though!

Thanks to my Favoriters and Alerters: **kittit24**, **LaylaBinx**, **brokenwriter**, **Murder Junkie**, **inu-hottie**, and **Dragon Fairies**.

And a huge thanks to my Reviewers: **Cooper Sterling**, **kittit24**, **LaylaBinx**, **Supporter Of Free Love**, **Black-Rose23**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, and **Anyminutenow**.

Disclaimer: Read previous chapters.

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10: Drive

Columbus never liked driving. Sure he drove before when he had to, but that didn't mean that he liked it. If anything it terrified him.

And when it came to things that terrified him Tallahassee always could figure them out. The only problem was that he would never tell Columbus that he had figured them out.

As such, Tallahassee would figure out there had to be something behind Columbus' fears and attempt to find the reason behind them.

So when Tallahassee finally found out that Columbus was scared of driving, the kid barely went sixty miles-per-hour and seemed extremely shaky, he came up with the most devious way of figuring it out.

"You want to go where?"

Tallahassee rolled his eyes and repeated himself. "I wanna go to the office where I got my driver's license."

Columbus snorted. "Why? You going to get it renewed?" Tallahassee resisted the urge to smack the boy upside the head.

"No, I'm not going to _get it renewed_." Tallahassee could resist but mock Columbus at the end.

"Then why are we going?"

Tallahassee gave Columbus one of his charming grins causing the ex-college student to blush and look away.

"We're goin' 'cuz I'm bored and if this shithole ever goes back 'ta normal I wanna start over with a clean slate. No tickets or anythin'."

Columbus just sat there taking what Tallahassee in. "Ok…I guess we can go…"

"Good, 'cuz we were goin' anyway. I just decided not to tell ya till now."

Ohio grumbled something under his breath that sounded suspiciously like a compliment and insult at the same time and Tallahassee couldn't help but grin.

Step 1: Complete.

**

* * *

**

It took them three days driving at breakneck speed to reach Tallahassee, Florida. Well, the outskirts of the town at least.

After staying at a cleaned out motel (and doing some very M rated things) they pushed on. They didn't stop or go sightseeing, just headed straight to the driving office.

As they went through the front door Columbus couldn't help but read the words 'Apex Traffic School' imprinted in neat black letters (1).

After scoping the building out, surprisingly there was no one there, Tallahassee walked past the counter and kicked a door open.

"Ah-ha! Where are ya little fucker? Columbus keep watch while I try to find it!" He exclaimed while rummaging through files; throwing them on the ground when he found out they weren't his.

Columbus took up a defensive position behind the counter and began to chew on one of his hoodie strings. There was really no noise in the office except for Tallahassee's swearing and file tossing. It was only after Tallahassee threw an empty file cabinet on the floor that the zombies started showing up.

It made Columbus wonder how if zombies didn't have ears, well not much of them left anyways, how could they hear so well?

As the first one came crashing through the front door though, he realized that he didn't care so much. He quickly took a page out of Tallahassee's book and threw a stapler at the zombie, the creature being taken down by it and a shot in the head from Columbus' shotgun finishing the job.

"Tallahassee, hurry up! The welcoming committee just showed up and they don't look too happy!" Columbus fired a round as he spoke and was about to shoot them again when out of nowhere a force hit him, sending him sprawling and his gun clattering to the ground.

He now had one of the fuckers sitting on top of him. Once again taking another tactic from Tallahassee, he kicked the zombie off of him. He scrabbled for his gun and once he got it fired into the zombie's skull.

The sound of screeching from his left side made him turn. There were three more zombies, two of which he had hit before and another new one. He raised his gun to fire, but only heard a clicking sound.

Now was so not the time to remember that he didn't have any ammo on him and his shotgun only held two bullets. As the zombies advanced the word 'fucked' went through his head but he paid it no heed.

Nope, he was staring at a flying filing cabinet watching as it smashed into all three of them. Knocking them all over and effectively trapping and killing them.

"Strike! That's how you do it spit-fuck!" Columbus stared at Tallahassee as he came around the corner. Tallahassee had just thrown a filing cabinet, and it didn't appear like he had broken a sweat doing it either.

"Hey, something wrong? You didn't get bit did you?!" Columbus was still shocked.

"Hello! Tallahassee to spit-fuck!"

Tallahassee had picked up a **filing cabinet** and had **thrown** it like it was a paper ball or something. "You threw a fucking filing…like what the hell? You didn't even, that was just…"

Columbus then promptly fainted from shock.

Step 2: Complete…well kind of.

**

* * *

**

When Columbus came to the first thing he noticed was that his head hurt like a bitch, causing him to groan.

The second thing he noticed came from the first. He had a lovely revolver pointed at his head.

"You mind not pointing that at me?" Columbus asked while weakly pushing the gun away.

"Sorry Columbus, didn't know if you were a zombie or not."

"Why would I be a zombie? I didn't get bitten."

Tallahassee snorted. "I couldn't tell if you got bit or not. That tends ta' happen when you don't say anything and then pass out. You hit your head pretty hard on the floor too. I'm pretty sure I heard a crack and everythin'."

Columbus was quiet at that. Why had he been staring? "Oh yeah, I saw you throw a cabinet like it was paper and not even break a sweat."

"Wait…you mean that's what you passed out for? You were shocked…" Tallahassee was now attempting to control his laughter and was epically failing.

"It's not that funny." Columbus muttered and stared out the window. Where he saw small and familiar buildings rush by.

"Uh…Tallahassee, why are we in Texas?"

There was that grin again, but Columbus was fooled by it like last time. "Well, we got my papers so I thought that we might as well get yours too!"

"Oh and what are we going to do then? Compare them?" Columbus practically growled. "And how long have I been out exactly?"

"Two days, and that's a great idea! Let's compare them, it'll be like a competition!" Columbus had fallen right into Tallahassee's trap.

Columbus on the other hand was just staring at Tallahassee with a look of disbelief. He wanted to say something, but what could he? Ohio ended up just sighing and turned to look out the window. He wasn't talking to Tallahassee.

As the time rolled by rather quickly, Columbus soon found himself standing in front of his old driving school. He could barely read the faded words 'All Star Driving School' on the wall (2).

"Man is that a lame name for a driving school." Tallahassee remarked with a chuckle.

"Shut up, it was cheap and they let me skip a bunch of tests. I practically went in there and got my license for doing nothing but paying."

Once again the door was open and Columbus paused for a moment as he walked inside. "J-Just stay here would you?" Was all he said before going to the back. Tallahassee wanted to follow him, but the boy had been nice enough to wait for him so, why not repay the favor?

Unlike the close to thirty minutes it had taken Tallahassee, Columbus was only gone a few seconds before coming back out. The first thing Tallahassee noticed was that the folder seemed slightly larger than most. Suspicious.

Either way step 3 was complete. Now for the final stage of his master plan.

**

* * *

**

Dread weighed down on Columbus like a heavy cloud. Tallahassee was going to read his file. Damn, damn, damn. His **parents** hadn't even seen what was in the folder, not that they would have cared anyway.

As Tallahassee pulled into an empty driveway at an abandoned house, Columbus could put his worry aside. He couldn't be distracted, it might get him killed (not to mention it was Rule 39: Don't Get Distracted).

Pushing the issue aside and grabbing his shotgun and ammo, he jumped out of the car. Tallahassee armed himself with a revolver and lead pipe.

"Let's go spit-fuck! Zombie huntin' time." Tallahassee slammed open the front door, he didn't break it thankfully, and let out a whoop. The effect was instantaneous.

One female zombie ran out of the kitchen wearing what looked like the "perfect sixties mother" clothes. Tallahassee lifted up the lead pipe and once she was close enough smashed her head with it. Once she went down though, the carnage didn't end. He beat her head until it was a bloody mess.

"I'm pretty sure she's dead Florida."

"I know she is, I'm just makin' sure though." Columbus nodded and moved past Tallahassee into the next room. It was bare except for a sofa. Out of which a zombie jumped from behind of, or at least attempted to.

"Holy shit." Yep that sounded like a correct statement. Tallahassee had come into the room and they were now watching the rather obese zombie attempt to clamor over the sofa. It was an attempt because the fat bastard was stuck right on the middle of the back of the sofa, frantically trying to grab the sofa cushions in front of him with his short grubby hands while his legs flailed in the air behind him.

The zombie was stuck and the scene made Tallahassee chuckle and Columbus attempt not to laugh (it wasn't working). And at hearing the laughter it tried to move more, but it didn't help just made them laugh harder.

Columbus deciding enough was enough lifted up his shotgun and fired twice. Once the zombie was dead it flopped over the back end, ending up on the floor behind the couch with a smack.

Columbus burst out laughing at the sound. It felt good to laugh after so long.

"Well so you can laugh a real laugh and not just that nervous chuckle." Columbus stopped laughing and looked away. Tallahassee sighed, Columbus did this a lot and it worried him. He would do something, and then a comment about it would shut the kid up. He didn't like that someone had caused his spit-fuck to act that way.

Tallahassee lightly grabbed Columbus and pulled him close, pressing a chaste kiss to the younger boy's forehead. "You didn't have to stop, I like your laugh it's nice."

"T-Thanks." Ohio was obviously embarrassed and Florida let the boy out of his grip. The moment had been nice, but Tallahassee hadn't forgotten what his plan was. He would figure out why Columbus was afraid to drive.

They brought the weapons inside and barricaded the house. They settled down at the kitchen table across from one another, each had their folders on the table. They exchanged them at the same time.

Columbus saw that Tallahassee's folder was rather thin and popped it open. He found a bunch of documentation for the driver's license and one speeding ticket that had been voided. The explanation for it being voided was that Tallahassee had been delivering his pregnant wife to the hospital. Columbus closed the folder, set it down on the table, and was met by piercing blue eyes when he looked up.

Columbus avoided the gaze. "I don't want to talk about it." He left the table after those words and went into the bedroom. There was only one and it had only one bed, but they had agreed to share. Columbus slipped into his side. It wasn't long before Tallahassee was next to him, pulling Columbus closer.

"How bad was it?"

"You read the hospital report." Columbus found himself being turned over so he was facing Florida.

"That's not what I meant."

"It was nothing but an accident."

Columbus now found himself pinned under Tallahassee. "Being hit by a drunk driver who was going over eighty miles-per-hour then going to the hospital for a broken leg, shattered arm, two broken ribs, three bruised ribs, and head trauma is **not** just an accident."

"I lived didn't I?" Tallahassee rolled his eyes, but laid down beside Columbus and pulled the boy close once again.

"That's not the point…what did your parents say?"

Tallahassee felt Columbus fist the front of his shirt. He knew talking about Columbus' parents was a more than a little bit of a painful subject.

"They didn't say anything, they didn't even go visit me in the hospital. No card, no phone call, and I had to pay the bill."

Tallahassee felt anger at Columbus' parents again. It hadn't been the first time that Columbus had said that his parents had done something to him along similar lines.

Making their kid walk to and fro school (which had been ten miles away) no matter what the weather, not taking care of him when he was sick, telling him he couldn't have friends, and once they found out their son mostly liked boys (they refused to accept that he was gay, just that he was confused) they didn't allow him to do basically anything.

"It's why I'm scared to drive. I mean I know that there's practically nobody that can hit me, but still…" Tallahassee flinched, he somewhat wished that he hadn't come up with this plan, but it was done.

"Didn't mean to drag up the past Columbus."

"It's ok, it was going to come out sometime, but this way is better." Tallahassee nodded and started to stroke Columbus' hair. It always seemed to calm the boy down.

"Hey Collie" Ohio glanced up when Tallahassee used the affectionate name. "Remember that fat bastard today trying to get over the couch?"

Columbus burst out laughing. "D-Don't remind me." Another bout of laughter. "That was so funny, worst zombie ever."

"You're cute when you laugh." Tallahassee commented before kissing Columbus.

"Shut up and go to sleep." Columbus muttered.

"Alright, though I wonder if you fall off the bed if you'll make a smack like that guy did." Columbus buried his face into Tallahassee's chest in an attempt not to laugh.

After a while of trying to control his laughter, Florida wasn't helping with the jokes, Columbus finally fell asleep along with Tallahassee.

The next morning Columbus offered to drive. Tallahassee had to admit that the kid was a good driver now that he had gotten over his fear.

After all not even he was good enough to take a ninety degree turn going over eighty perfectly. He would later say that Columbus just knew the roads in the area better.

* * *

Ne, so did you enjoy it? I hope you did! I really enjoyed writing this.

(1) This school really does exist. I GoogleMaped it though and didn't really get a clear picture of the outside though so I kinda made up the name information. Also no, I don't know what the inside looks like.

(2) I apologize if I offended anyone who went there with my name criticism. I also GooleMaped this one, but couldn't find a sign anywhere so I made the name part up. Once again I have never been inside this one either. Also, the information I presented about this school is **NOT TRUE** I have no clue what the school is like, but just made something up about it. I again greatly apologize if anyone was offended because of this, I mean no offence whatsoever.

Up next I'm taking a change and I'm writing a one-shot inspired by a part in another one-shot. If you haven't read Wamble Gallimaufry by **KyoSohmaLuver** I most definitely recommend you do. They have fabulous and amazing one-shots. It's also the second chapter where my inspiration comes from so you might be confused about what my inspiration was if you don't read it.

~Kara


	11. Name

Hm...this one was out rather quickly... Ok, I have no clue why I feel so confused by that... Anyway! So as said previous chapter I got this idea from Wamble Gallimaufry so this chapter is dedicated to **KyoSohmaLuver**, I hope you enjoy it.

No Alerters or Favoriteres, so onto the reviewers! Thanks bunches to **LaylaBinx** and **kittit24**. Thanks for reviewing guys!

Also, this one is in Columbus' POV, so if you guys see anything OOC be sure to tell me! I always have room for improvement.

* * *

11: Name

"Don't call me that, it makes me sound all gay."

I stared at Tallahassee puzzled. "You don't want me to call you my boyfriend?"

"Exactly. It makes me sound more gay than I actually am." I wanted to point out that Tallahassee was (sort of unofficially) dating me, and that you couldn't get much gayer than that, but I didn't.

"So what exactly should I call you?"

Tallahassee just stared at me. "Now what are you talkin' about?"

"You said that you didn't want me to call you my boyfriend. So what do you want me to call you?"

"Uh, why don't you just pick somethin' alright?" I sighed, Tallahassee could be difficult that was for sure.

**A Few Days Later**

I could tell that Tallahassee was pissed. Though I didn't exactly know who or what it was about, I knew that Tallahassee was pissed.

"Wow Columbus way to go. What did you do this time?" Wichita asked, joining me in the kitchen of a now vacated house.

"What's that supposed to mean? I didn't do anything!"

"I think you did. Florida only gets like this when you do something wrong." She said, while digging around in the pantry for anything that could be eaten.

"That's just it though, I mean aside from those other survivors that we met today, nothing happened." I, unfortunately, had fridge duty and it wasn't fun having to poke around in a foul smelling fridge where you didn't know what anything was or if it was even supposed to be that color.

"Hey didn't you call Tallahassee your friend? What was up with that? I mean you two are much closer than friends, trust me Little Rock and I hear it sometimes." I'm pretty sure I turned a darker shade than a tomato at her statement.

"Well he told me that he didn't like me calling him my boyfriend."

"So, ah shit fucking roach, you decided to call him your friend instead?"

"Well…yeah."

"Mother fucking, god damn little fucker!"

Ok what? I spun around to ask Wichita what I had done to deserve the language and found her attempting to get a rat off of one of the shelves. It was a big black evil looking thing, like the type you heard of in stories and movies, but never actually saw.

"Need some help there?" I asked reluctantly while slowly inching closer. I was watching Wichita poke at the rat with a broom (where the hell had she gotten that from?) and it spit and hiss at her in return.

"Actually yeah, since you're taller than me you wouldn't mind trying to get the little guy down for me would you?" I knew this wouldn't end good. I hesitantly grabbed the broom and poked the rat once. It lunged at me. Doing what anybody does when they're being attacked, I dropped the broom and yelped as the rat bit my hand.

"Get it off! Get it off! Get it off!" I yelled as I furiously shook my hand.

"I can't! Just shake your hand harder!"

"That's the most useless advice ever!" I flung my hand out at the statement and heard a sick pop, squelch, and thudding sound.

We both watched as the rat picked itself up from where it had hit the wall and bared its teeth, its mouth bloody from where some of its teeth had popped out and were now imbedded in my hand.

Wichita and I stared at each other before hearing a loud bang. We turned to see smoke where the rat would have been.

"You guys could have just shot it you know?" As always, Little Rock to the rescue. "And I couldn't help but to hear your conversation and I'm pretty sure that you hurt Tallahassee's feelings."

"Really?" The sarcasm practically dripped from the word as I let Wichita pull the rat teeth out (with her hand) that were still embedded.

"Columbus I'm being serious here. I really think you hurt him."

"Well, ouch, what do you want me to do?" Wichita was now cleaning the wound with alcohol, man did that burn.

"It's not that hard Columbus! Just apologize to him." Little Rock said this while shooting me one of her famous 'are-you-stupid' looks.

"What then? Ow, not so tight you're kind of cutting off my circulation." Wichita rolled her eyes, but bandaged my hand with less force.

"I don't know Columbus! I'm only like thirteen; I'm not a relationship wizard! Also, **you're **the one dating him, not me."

"Ok, all finished you wimp." Wichita then returned to looking back in the pantry. I really hoped that she didn't find more rats in there. One was enough for me. At Little Rock clearing her throat though, I was brought back into the conversation.

"But he doesn't have to be so difficult!"

"Man Tallahassee was right, you are like a bitch." Wichita giggled at the comment.

"I'm the bitch? He's the one who was all _'Don't call me your boyfriend, it makes me sound all gay'_." I pouted after my, somewhat bad, impersonation of Tallahassee was over.

"Wait he said that?"

"Yeah! Can you believe the nerve of him?"

"I know you're obviously the gayer one."

"I know right? Hey wait!" I heard Wichita barely controlling the bits of laughter that were beginning to escape her.

"Sorry Columbus, but it's true. I mean you kind of give off that gay vibe, Tallahassee though doesn't."

"Really? Then what kind of vibe does Tallahassee give then?"

"Obviously a more kickass one, duh." I just stared at Little Rock. What the hell did that mean?

"I think I'm going to go apologize now." It was the only thing I could say.

Once I had left the kitchen I guessed Wichita couldn't contain it and burst into laughter. "Best conversation ever."

I didn't miss Wichita's laughter though as I shuffled upstairs to where Tallahassee was. After meekly knocking on the door of the man's room, I entered.

"Tallahassee?" Said man grunted from under the covers. I crossed the room and couldn't help but think that the situation was reversed. Normally it would be me sulking under covers while Tallahassee would comfort him.

I nervously stood in front of Tallahassee and wrung my hands together. "Look Talla, I'm sorry about what I said. But I couldn't think of anything else for me to call you."

Silence. Sighing, I slid down the wall next to the bed. "Tallahassee, just hit me already. It'll make both of us feel better." I heard Tallahassee roll over and I braced myself. Maybe he would hit me with less than fifty percent.

"I'm not gonna hit ya spit-fuck." Ok that was a shocker.

"Well do something I already feel like an ass for hurting your feelings." I buried my face in my arms after the statement. Needless to say, I was more than a little surprised when I felt Tallahassee running his fingers through my hair.

"Better?" I nodded and moved my head hair closer to the warmth of Tallahassee's hand. I sucked in a deep breath and decided now was the time to push on.

"So, what do you want me to call you?"

"Columbus-"

"Tallahassee if we ever want to get over this you need to decide…or would you rather just have me call you a 'friend' every time someone asks?" Tallahassee growled at the latter.

"Fine, fine, got any ideas?"

"Well I know that **boyfriend** is out of the question."

"Don't call me that, it makes me sound gay."

"Like I haven't heard that before; you got any ideas."

"Well partner…" Suddenly Tallahassee got one of those 'I'm-a-genius-and-I-know-it' looks on his face.

I caught on quickly. "Partner?"

Tallahassee moved from his sitting position to where he was laying on his stomach on the bed. "Yep, I mean you always hear about it and it's quite a friendly word. Like oh what was it…yeah I think it was that Tempra-pedi commercial (1), you ever notice it said that '_you and your partner_' part?"

"I didn't really watch T.V. a lot, so no." Tallahassee rolled his eyes.

"Either way, that's our term when around other people we don't know."

Now it was my turn to be confused. "Wait, what about around people we do know?"

"Fuck buddies?" I'm pretty sure that I would have hit Florida if I hadn't known that the hick was joking. "Now for you though-"

"Wha?" Hey wait, why did he get to decided what I called him!

"Don't interrupt. For you, I guess…you can call me your boyfriend." Tallahassee finally grumbled out, slightly embarrassed.

I sat there shocked. Had Tallahassee, the man who refused anything remotely gay (except maybe beside Twinkies) just allowed me to be able to call him my boyfriend. I took a couple of deep breaths and let the words sink in. He had really said that.

Without warning I leaned over and kissed Tallahassee. "Thanks Talla." I then got extremely nervous, what I was about to do was so taboo. I leaned close to Tallahassee and whispered in his ear, just as Wichita had done to me.

And told him my real name.

* * *

Hm...I was extremely pleased with the ending. Maybe I'll do a short follow up...interesting. But as always it won't be the next one, I've already planned for that one to be an AU, so stay frosty guys.

(1) It's supposed to be Tempur-Pedic, but I didn't know how to spell it so I sorta guessed. Also I think that it's this commercial...it could be another matress commercial...

~Kara


	12. Culture

Yeah, I decided that it's probably going to take about a week, maybe more to fix Silent Hill. It's probably going to end up one of my longest so ja... Anyway, moving on! This one also revolves around my College AU. Uh, if you didn't catch what that was on my last chapter I'll explain at the end.

A thanks to my alerters: **OokamiJudge**, **Reader One**, and **Cooper Sterling**.

A big thanks to my reviewers: **Black-Rose23**, **Cooper Sterling**, **Murder Junkie**, **LaylaBinx**, **kittit24**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, **KyoSohmaLuver**, and **Anyminutenow**.

* * *

12: Culture

Little Rock's mom had loved culture. But not just any culture. Native American culture.

Her mom had traveled across the states just to learn more about the culture and people themselves. To say she was utterly fascinated would be an understatement.

It was on one of these expeditions that she was pregnant with Little Rock. She had gone to the great capital of Arkansas hearing that the place was full of Native American heritage. She hadn't been disappointed.

She had told Wichita, who was eight at the time, that going to Little Rock had been her greatest adventure, and the peak of her travels so far. She told Wichita that there was going to be many more travels to see many more great Native American places.

Then came when Little Rock was born.

Lying on that hospital bed, seeing Little Rock after she was born, changed something in their mom. She had decided right then and there that there would be no more Native American hunts until her kids were older.

But she had wanted to remember her fondest memory, and what she would eventually go back to.

"So, what shall her name be?"

Their mother had just beamed brilliantly. "Little Rock."

And it was done.

Three years later their mom had died. She had gotten cancer and hadn't lived long. Little Rock with her already different name, was now even more of an outcast for not having a mom. It wasn't until Little Rock was eight that things got bad.

"Little Rock, what a stupid name. Your mom was so dumb she couldn't even name you something good!" A boy taunted.

Little Rock punched him in the face, and delivered a swift kick to his nether regions afterwards. "Insult my mom again and I'll rip you a new one."

Needless to say, Little Rock ended up in the principal's office countless times. And Wichita, who was sixteen and had a license and her own car, would have to pick her up.

"Let me guess it was the same kid?" Little Rock just nodded.

"And what did you tell the principal when he asked you what happened."

A smirk. "I told him that the kid insulted my name and he was asking for it. Also, he should be lucky that I didn't beat him more."

Wichita just smiled, she couldn't wait to see how Little Rock would turn out when she was older.

* * *

Hm...this one didn't want to get written at the end, and I really couldn't figure out how to end it, so I'm pretty sure that if it sounds off that's why.

Ok I did say I would explain my College AU ne? Anyway this one of my AU's takes place when everybody (except Little Rock, who's still 12) is in college. For this one I made Columbus and Wichita the same age (19) and Tallahassee a bit older (like 20 going on 21). This AU has some weird and somewhat impossible parts, but it's all mine so ja.

Also I do have another AU, inspired by my friend. She told me that Columbus was also in Adventureland (which if you don't know takes place in an amusement park, the irony) so I invented my Carnival AU. Basically takes place in an Amusement Park, though I haven't figured out who'll be what yet, but expect something from there soon.

~Kara


	13. Hoodie

So, back to the zombie apocalypse. No, clue about anything for the next chapter, but I was inspired by this by watching the movie again.

Thanks to my Alerters/Favoriters: **BadLuck and Karma**, **RaayJ**, and **Blue Tyr**.

And a big thanks to my Reviewers: **LaylaBinx**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, **Cooper Sterling**, **RaayJ**, and **Anyminutenow**.

* * *

13: Hoodie

He was going to kill that little spit-fuck. Just plain kill him. He should have noticed it with all the little quirks that the kid had been giving off.

The way he stared at him a bit too long, afterwards looking away and blushing when Tallahassee caught him doing so. How the kid never looked him in the eye, always somewhere else, and fiddled with the hem of his shirt when Tallahassee talked to him. Also, the way the kid threw him those smiles…

He had suspected that something was fishy, now he had the last piece to go with it.

When Tallahassee stopped the car, Columbus stared at him strangely. "You ok?"

Florida just tapped his fingers on the steering wheel. "Spit-fuck, you cheatin' on me?"

Columbus sputtered, eyes wide. "What? No! Who would I cheat with anyway?"

"Well, you did spend some time with that bitch some miles back." Tallahassee had stopped tapping on the steering wheel and had settled on having his arms crossed over chest, he still didn't look at Columbus. But then again, it was hard to tell with those sunglasses on.

"Bit… Oh! You mean Wichita? Yeah we talked a bit, but nothing happened."

Tallahassee grabbed Ohio by the front of his hoodie and brought him close. "Then why do you smell like a girl?"

"I-I don't know! I haven't taken a shower in like forever. I mean sure this is a clean hoodie but…" Columbus seemed to be thinking of something and Tallahassee took the time to bring the ex-college student closer.

He took a big whiff. Smelled like Columbus. He then brought his nose close to the hoodie and repeated the process. Tallahassee practically shoved the boy back when the extremely flowery smell entered his nose. It was so disgusting, so girly.

"All right then, you've got some explainin' as to why your hoodie is cheatin' on me."

Columbus nearly slapped himself, nearly. He knew the hick could be off his rocker sometimes, but this was just plain crazy.

"Florida, in case you haven't noticed, my hoodie isn't the one you're fucking."

Tallahassee took a deep breath and took off the sunglasses, placing them on the dash. He unlocked the car and got out. Columbus watched as Tallahassee walked in front of the car to his side and pulled the door open, giving him the sign to get out.

Columbus cautiously got out of the car and heard the door shut behind him. Tallahassee walked until he was standing in front of Columbus, giving him that same look he had when they had first met. Out of reaction the boy took a step back, the older man a step forward.

Columbus only stopped retreating because he finally backed into the side of the Hummer. He gulped nervously as Tallahassee put one hand on either side of his head, effectively trapping him.

"I'm gonna tell ya somethin' and I'm only gonna tell you once." Ohio was all ears at this point. "You may own that hoodie, but **I** own **you**. Get the picture?" Columbus nodded. "Good. So I'll ask you again. Why is your hoodie cheatin' on me?"

"Well you see t-technically it's not cheating on you." Tallahassee growled. "W-What I mean to say is, I'm pretty sure the last time I wore this hoodie was when I was attacked 406 after she slept on me for a couple of hours. And that was after she was bitten by a zombie hobo."

Columbus swore he was going to have some sort of heart attack with how fast his heart was beating. Tallahassee wasn't doing anything, not reacting like he should be, but just staring.

"Get in the car." The redneck pulled away and Columbus practically flew into the Hummer. It wasn't long before Tallahassee joined him and the drive began again. Well, for a short while.

"That reminds me Columbus, either figure out a way to get rid of that smell, or burn that hoodie." Columbus didn't even ask why, he already knew, but he was sort of disappointed. This was one of his favorite hoodies.

* * *

So there you go, another chapter, though quite short.

Also, I saw Adventureland and it really helped me to get into my Carnival AU (this name fits it more), if you guys haven't seen it then you totally should. I'm pretty sure you can see it on Youtube (that's where I just saw it) so go check it out. Though, I did feel bad with Columbus being punched down there by his friend, I did like the whole drinking and weed smoking twist. Ah, I'm giving too much away. Sorry.

~Kara


	14. Alcohol

Ok, faithful readers! Here's another chapter! Hope you guys enjoy.

Thanks to my Alerter: **gothgrrl13**

A big thanks to my Reviewers: **Cooper Sterling**, **Murder Junkie**, **kittit24**, **LaylaBinx**, **Anyminutenow**, and **Black-Rose23**.

Also, some big news at the bottom so you might want to read that!

* * *

14: Alcohol

"Want some more?" Tallahassee asked shaking the bottle of Bourbon he currently had in one of his hands at Columbus.

The two had stopped at an abandoned bar, and after clearing it out, Tallahassee had found tons of alcohol. After searching for about thirty minutes though, he had settled on a bottle of Bourbon and opened it.

After deeming it was ok to drink, he really just wanted the first swig of alcohol (not that the kid was going to do anything about it anyway), he found a shot glass for Columbus and joined the boy in a bedroom they had found in the back.

It was relatively small, with only one bed and one table, but they made due sitting on the floor.

"Nope, just one and done." Tallahassee rolled his eyes at Columbus' typical response. He had heard it every time he asked the kid if he wanted a drink and was honestly quite tired of hearing it.

It probably didn't help Columbus that Tallahassee knew that the kid actually just got rid of the shots instead of just drinking them. It honestly wasn't that hard to tell.

Though truth be told he had only found out because after offering the kid a shot, a couple seconds later he had kissed the kid and didn't even taste the alcohol on the boy's lips.

"Kid, you need ta' learn to grow up. Now have another one." Columbus opened his mouth to protest, but Tallahassee had already poured him another glass. "Come on, what's the worst that could happen?"

The ex-college student gulped nervously. He had been able to toss the first shot out, but with Florida's eyes on him like that there was no way he was going to be able to. Sucking in a deep breath Columbus knew he didn't have a choice, he lifted the glass and downed it in one go.

He found himself remembering the familiar taste much more than he would have liked. He always did have a soft spot for Bourbon. Columbus found himself feeling sick at the words.

Slamming the shot glass back on the table, Columbus grabbed the bottle and took a swig.

"Well, who knew you'd have it in ya spit-fuck." Ohio just poured himself another shot and handed the bottle back over to Tallahassee. The older man was slightly surprised, but didn't say anything.

The two drank for minutes on end until the bottle was empty (it had only been half full when Tallahassee found it). Once finished Tallahassee was still fine, there was just that tingling feeling in his stomach. Columbus on the other hand, was probably slightly over tipsy and barely below drunk.

"Man spit-fuck I didn't think you had it in ya."

"Really? Because I do, yeah, I do."

"'Course you do. Though I didn't take you for the drinkin' type."

Columbus shook his head wildly from side to side. "No, I'm not my dad."

"What do you mean you're not your dad? I mean no offence, but having shut-in's for parents would kinda make someone think they don't drink." Columbus was quiet. He had that face on like he had said something he shouldn't have.

"Ihaveastep-dad." The words were so rushed together it took Tallahassee a bit of time to figure out what Columbus had said.

"A step-dad? So, what about your actual dad?"

"Don't wanna talk about it." Florida thought he'd have to get his ears checked. Did Columbus honestly just use the word 'wanna'? The kid must have been more wasted than Tallahassee thought originally.

"Why? Don't think I'll understand?"

The words tumbled from Columbus' mouth before his intoxicated brain could think them through. "Well you really weren't a parent for that long…"

Columbus didn't even have time to react (not that he would have been able to anyway) before he found himself beneath Tallahassee on the floor, his cheek hurting from where the redneck had punched him.

"You wanna say that again bitch? 'Cuz I'll have you know that I can kill your ass before you could do anythin'." The look in Tallahassee's eyes was murderous and in his fog laden mind, Columbus was sure that normally he would have been scared shitless by it.

"You would've made a great dad." Well that threw Tallahassee off. He had been expecting an apology or for the kid to actually be stupid enough to say it again, but not that.

"Like trust me you would have. I mean your nice and kind and protective and all that other mushy stuff you don't like me to describe you as. And you're not a scared shut-in or a drunken bastard, so I'm pretty sure you would've been awesome as a dad."

Tallahassee was sure the kid was drunk now. Columbus would never had said those things if wasn't. He also wouldn't be kissing Tallahassee as fiercely as he was now. Feeling the kid tug at the front of his jeans though made him stop.

"Oh hell no spit-fuck. I'm horny, but I won't take advantage of you and fuck you when you're drunk." Columbus made a whining noise in the back of his throat before somehow managing to flip them.

"Fine. But you better soon ok, I'm getting tired of you not doing anything. You need to nut up or shut up." Tallahassee would have retorted if the kid hadn't fallen asleep right after his little speech.

Looking over to his left Tallahassee saw the forlorn looking Bourbon bottle. Yeah, he most defiantly wasn't letting Columbus drink alcohol again.

* * *

Ok, so uh...wow I really find myself having nothing to say after the chapter is over, you know?

Anyway, my big news. After figuring out that I have all this work to do I kinda need help with ideas. So, if you people want to send in any requests then feel free to do so. If you want to be anonymous or don't feel like logging in (or have a log in) I do have Anonymous Reviewing Enabled in case you want to send in an request! Also, feel free to PM them to me too.

And yes, I do accept anything from smut to fluff. From (attempted) Humor to Tradgedy to uh...I don't know Crack if you want to go there. But the point it I accept anything. Send it in and I'll figure out someway to do it, if you don't like what I write for you just tell me and I'll take it down. And you can decide if I rewrite it or whatever.

~Kara


	15. Laser Tag

Wow, so like I was expecting this to turn out to be like five pages until I noticed it was ten. This was my face, no joke. O.O

Also, while writing this I thought I was completing a request, but then when I looked back over them I noticed that everybody who asked for another character wanted it back in the Zombieland universe, so I didn't end up with one request filled. Fail, I know.

A thanks to all my Alerters/Favoriters: **TheHowlingMoon**, **..Love**, **tigereyez777**, **Youko'sgirl16**, and **Supporter of Free Love**.

And an huge thanks to my Alerters (you guys gave me awesome ideas): **..Love**, **Murder Junkie**, **Black-Rose23**, **Anyminutenow**, **A Kiss For A Kill**, **Supporter of Free Love**, _Bubbles_, **LaylaBinx**, and **kittit24**.

Also, even though I didn't fufill the prompt, which was supposed to take place in the Z-Land Universe, I still would like to dedicate this chapter to **Supporter of Free Love**. I will do the one you requested where it takes place in Z-Land, but just wanted to say that this one's for you.

OH, nearly forgot, this takes place in my College AU. So, just reminding everyone, they're all in college, except Little Rock who's the same age.

* * *

15: Laser Tag

"_Players! Welcome to Laser Tag! We hope you know how to play this game otherwise you're fucked! Have fun in our Laser Tag Maze Arena and let the best badass win!"_

In the right corner of the nearly dark room a large door slid upwards and the four people shuffled through it.

"_Oh and I forgot to mention that there are six recharge stations on each floor. Two on respective team sides that only your team can use, and two in the middle of the arena. This is the same top and bottom."_

"I think I'm going to be sick." The other three stopped to look at the other one.

"Don't be such a pussy Columbus. Nothing is going to happen; they're only fake guns after all." Wichita demonstrated this by pointing her gun at Columbus and firing, obviously nothing happened.

Columbus didn't appear to be satisfied by that, but didn't say anything else. The four continued the short walk until they arrived at their side of the laser tag arena. A man with awkward looking well…everything approached. (1)

"Ok guys I kinda feel bad for you 'cuz like you're going to get your asses kicked. Uh… have any of you actually played laser tag before?"

Tallahassee, Little Rock, and Wichita raised their guns. Columbus just stood there looking nervous, but the guy didn't pay any attention to him. He was busy checking out Wichita instead.

"Well ok, I was good at laser tag once to you know. The best, but I'm not anymore, so yeah…" He laughed nervously. "Do you need me to stick around or anything, 'cuz I'm not doing anything." He was staring right at Wichita as he said this. (2)

"You know what, actually we're good, yeah… Wouldn't want to disrupt you from your job."

The man grinned weirdly and nodded. "Yeah, my jobs important, I better go do that, see ya!"

Wichita smiled her fake smile until the man was out of eyeshot. "Okay, that guy was officially creepy." The others nodded their heads in agreement.

"Wichita and I call top!" Little Rock called out when the four of them did nothing.

"What? Naw, you can't do that!" Tallahassee called out when Wichita and Little Rock went up the ramp.

"We called it first so we can! Besides, who else is going to protect Columbus from all the big bad players?" Little Rock mocked.

Tallahassee growled, but instead of retorting, grabbed Columbus' hand and dragged him down the ramp to the bottom section of the arena.

They filled their guns at the recharge station and afterwards stood there waiting for the game to start.

"I'm sorry." Tallahassee turned to Columbus, who once again had his hoodie string in his mouth. Something he did when he was nervous. "I-I mean if you didn't have to watch out for me you could have probably gone with them."

"Ohio you listen here." Said college student flinched when Tallahassee put his hand on Columbus' shoulder and spun him around. "It's not a problem for me to watch out for you. Hell, if the whole world went to shit in some sort of zombie apocalypse or something, I'd still watch out for you."

Columbus blushed at the confession and quickly pressed his lips to the slightly older student's in a quick kiss. "Thanks Talla."

Tallahassee just grinned and ruffled Columbus' hair. "No problem spit-fuck."

"_Welcome laser tag warriors! I hope that by now you've gotten your shit together, if you haven't you better learn quick or have a kickass partner. But, getting off topic, it's time for you guys to head out into an all out shit storm and let the best team kick the other team's ass!"_

A loud siren wail went out and the game started.

Without even waiting Tallahassee dashed into the field of neon green and black plastic barriers and had disappeared from sight before Columbus could do anything. With a quiet groan Columbus followed Tallahassee into the fray. He was his boyfriend's back up after all.

At least, the plan was to follow him. Instead the arena was so big that he got twisted up around the green area in a state of confusion. Eventually though he found what appeared to be the other team's base. Except it was totally unguarded and the position his was in allowed him to be able to shoot their base, but kept him hidden from view.

So taking a deep breath, Columbus attempted to shoot the gun. Nothing happened. It took him two more tries while fiddling with it to finally figure out how to shoot. Once he did though, warning bells went off.

"_Red team, your base is being pwned. You might wanna get over there and catch whoever's shooting at it."_

Columbus was vaguely aware of the fits of rage that he heard. Instead he just kept shooting the base until his gun was out of ammo. Well, that was fun, but it was time to split. He was once again **attempting** to find his way back to his side to no avail. He was completely lost.

That was until he heard a giant whoop, and knew who it was. He skirted in that direction and found himself at a reload station. After reloading he continued heading in the same direction that he had started from.

"God damn it!" Yep that was Tallahassee alright, except from the direction he had just come from. He was starting to head that way when he heard a hissing noise.

"_Alright my amigos, that sound means that there's only two minutes left in the game. It also means that fog is now going to surround you so that you can't see. Please be careful in moving around, because if you go Spartan on us and don't pay attention to where you're going you could end up hitting one of those big plastic thingies."_

They weren't kidding about the fog. You couldn't see anything, which was bad for Columbus. Oh how he wished he had a radio right now. (3)

As he walked through the maze, he wasn't trying to find Tallahassee, he was just trying to get out of there before he had a panic attack. Which, judging with how he was starting to slowly hyperventilate, was on its way.

It didn't help that his over-active imagination (4) decided to kick in right then and there. No longer was anything the way it was supposed to be. It was as if he had returned to that Silent Hill fiasco. (5)

Columbus wanted to move but couldn't, his breath quickened and then altogether stopped when he heard it. One of those horrible growling noises. Slowly turning around Columbus froze, there standing only a couple of feet away from him was a Groaner.

The dog growled and blood dripped from its mouth. It stepped closer and Columbus watched as the already decaying flesh rippled, blood and pus coming from the muscle and flesh that could be seen.

A siren wail went off and Columbus watched transfixed as the dog grew bigger. It's rotting flesh fell off in bits revealing organs, bone, and causing more blood and pus to come out of it. He watched the remaining skin darken to black and curl, giving it a burnt look. When the maggots started erupting from the face of the dog though Columbus thought he was going to be sick.

It was right then and there that he ran. He had no clue where he was going, but stopped when he ran into the side of a house. He could hear the static in his ears as the monster grew closer. Ohio backed himself into the wall and slid down it, whimpering at the thought of seeing that dog again.

He heard the foot (actually paw) steps coming closer and did exactly what first instinct told him to do.

**

* * *

**

They were so fucked his round was Tallahassee's only thought as he shot his gun at the other player, wiping out their life points, before ducking down behind a barrier.

He had heard that someone from his team had gotten to the other teams base, but didn't think anything of it. It was probably Wichita or Little Rock or maybe it could have been Columbus.

Speaking of Columbus; where was the spit-fuck?

He was supposed to be Tallahassee's back up, but that obviously hadn't happened. Though, he probably didn't help the matter by running off like he had at the start of the match.

Tallahassee had only just recharged his gun when he heard it. "TALLAHASSEE!" Shit, what had the spit-fuck gotten himself into now?! Florida didn't waste a second though as he moved in the direction of the scream.

Damn, why did this place have to be so confusing!

* * *

Another man though had also heard the scream and went in the same direction as it. He really hoped that someone was in trouble and it wasn't that two people were getting it on in the arena.

He heard a whimper as he got closer to the area and his fears were mostly laid (no pun intended) to rest when he found out that it was not two people getting it on, but another boy curled up in a ball.

"Hey kid, you ok?" The boy whimpered and clutched his legs closer to his body.

"It's alright; I'm not going to hurt you. My name is Colby Wisconsin, what's yours?"

The boy looked up and Colby froze, enchanted by those dark green eyes (6) "C-Columbus Ohio."

"Ah, well, Columbus; do you need some help?"

Colby watched the boy judge if he actually could be trusted and seemed to settle on a confirmation, because the boy held his hand out. Wisconsin just smiled and helped the other boy up, purposely pulling harder than necessary so that Columbus landed on his chest.

"Uh, sorry." The other boy muttered pulling away from Colby's vice like grip which had somehow encased him.

Columbus thought something was fishy about Colby. He seemed off somehow.

"You ok now?" The boy smiled and Columbus couldn't help but to move backwards. There was something so…devious about that smile.

"Yeah I'm good…" He did not like the way that Colby was looking at him. It was like Tallahassee looked at him right before they fucked, except this one was more malicious. Columbus gulped nervously as Wisconsin advanced, his arm beginning to extend in order to grab the college student.

"Columbus!" Everything froze and Colby was aware of the gun pointed at him. Well it was only a laser gun so it wouldn't do much but still...

"Tallahassee!" So this…cowboy was Tallahassee. Colby assessed Tallahassee, and noticed the other doing the same. His conclusion drew something bad though, it was obvious that he would be no match for the other man.

"Florida, you do realize you're pointing a laser gun, right?" At the comment Tallahassee lowered his gun.

"'Course I do spit-fuck." Colby was taken aback by the strong southern accent. He was distracted from his thoughts by a sigh from Columbus. Looking back at the shorter boy he was paralyzed once more.

The boy was smiling, and it made him look beautiful. He felt the lust and want course through his body, but quickly snapped out of those thoughts when he remembered that the smile was directed at that redneck.

"Um, thanks Colby, but I'm sure I'll be ok now." Wisconsin nodded and decided to leave. He wouldn't win this right now.

**

* * *

**

Tallahassee was relieved when the other guy left and didn't waste any time in walking over to Columbus and pulling the boy into a searing kiss.

"You ok?" He asked again when he pulled back. He could tell something was wrong when Columbus only hugged him like the world was going to end. Tallahassee's response was only to wrap his arms around the other college student and kiss the top of his head.

Florida knew that Columbus had a hard time saying what scared him or asking for help. He thought that it proved that he was weak and always needed to be taken care of. Tallahassee thought that his phobias were cute though and he **liked** taking care of Columbus (it let him show-off).

Either way though he knew Columbus would never reveal his secrets that easily. Tallahassee had tried and it always ended with the boy shutting himself down and clamming up.

But he was digressing. After the hug, the game had ended; the lights turning on and the fog dissipating. The two were able to make it out with no confusion and were glad when they did.

"Geez what took you two so long? Come on lets go get our scores!" Tallahassee couldn't help but chuckle at Little Rock's antics.

They went over to the game counter. "So let me guess you guys are the team that kicked ass right?"

"No, I'm pretty sure we sucked." Came Wichita's sarcastic reply.

"Well I'm pretty sure you didn't. You guys were the green team right? You won by a shitload of points." The group of four stared at each other confused. The guy at the counter sighed heavily. "Look dudes, we had a system malfunction today so hitting the other team's base gave you like 10,000 points per shot. And player…two it appears, hit the target with all the bullets that one gun can hold."

Three of them turned to look at "player two".

"You're kidding me right?" That was Wichita.

"I thought you said you never played laser tag before." The confused one was Little Rock.

"Well, hell Ohio, who knew that you'd have it in ya?" Tallahassee reached over and patted Columbus' shoulder roughly.

Columbus on the other hand was dumbfounded. It had been a total accident that he had managed to make it to the other side of the field and get all those points. "But…I…wha?"

"Hey guys I'm kind of hungry, can we get some pizza?" Of course, Columbus would be impressive by accidentally winning the game, and Little Rock would have already moved on to the next important thing.

"Sure, why not? Plus, it'll give guppy over here a chance to get over his shock." Wichita smirked when Columbus floundered around trying to speak, but no words coming out of his mouth because of the shock and the plain fact that he had no comeback.

They walked over to where the food area was and Columbus and Tallahassee sat a booth while Wichita and Little Rock went to go order the pizza.

"You're gonna have to tell me sometime."

Columbus stared at Tallahassee confusedly.

"I'm talkin' 'bout what happened between you and that fucker when I wasn't there."

"You mean Colby Wisconsin?" Tallahassee felt his blood boil at that worm's name coming out of Columbus' mouth.

"I don't fuckin' care 'bout or want to hear is name." Columbus, as always, was oblivious to what was wrong with Tallahassee.

"Tallahassee it's just a name…" He was about to go on about how it was only a name like everyone had (7) but didn't when he saw the look Florida was giving him. There was an emotion in those normally peaceful and fun blue eyes that were turning them dark.

And though it took him a few seconds he figured it out, and was surprised by the answer. Was Tallahassee actually jealous? He knew the older student could be, no, **was** possessive, but he wasn't the type to get jealous. Was he?

Columbus was about to ask Tallahassee when Wichita and Little Rock came back from ordering.

"Something happen?" Little Rock was always the all-knowing-one of the group.

"It was only something minor, nothing to worry about."

Tallahassee felt an unknown feeling rise up inside of him. So their conversations were only minor ones? He wondered if the talk Columbus had with Colton (or whatever the fuck his name was) had been important and maybe the spit-fuck would rather talk to that ass rather than him.

"Tallahassee you ok?" Tallahassee didn't even look at the younger college student.

"What happened to Wichita and Little Rock?"

"They left to go get the pizza." The two sat there in an awkward silence. Finally though Tallahassee was pulled out of his thoughts (which would be the best way to kill Conner) when he felt a hand intertwine with his.

Tallahassee looked over to Columbus and noticed the younger boy staring at the table with an uncontrollable blush on his face. Tallahassee resisted the urge to kiss the boy knowing how tough the action of just grabbing Tallahassee's hand in public was to the younger boy. After all the kid was sort of a prude.

Either way, the hand somehow made him calm down. Florida didn't know what caused it, but just Columbus holding his hand always allowed all the negative emotions to just float away.

"Pizza's here!" Little Rock set down the two medium size pizzas. One was cheese, the other all meat. Little Rock and Tallahassee didn't waste any time digging into the all meat, while Columbus and Wichita took their time eating the cheese pizza.

After a while though, the meat eaters started to slow down and conversation was started. They chatted about idle things: How were they doing in school, what Little Rock was going to be when she grew up, sly jokes about Columbus' and Tallahassee's relationship, and just the normal and random things that friends talked about.

In the middle of one of their conversations, whether kid movies were growing up themselves or not (8), they were interrupted.

"I'm telling you they are! Did you not see Planet 51? Those two guys were about to kiss!" Little Rock insisted.

"No way, they always put that kind of stuff in kid movies."

"Really, because I didn't see those kinds of actions in the Land Before Time!"

Tallahassee stared at Little Rock strangely while talking. "Yeah 'cuz it's a kid movie."

"I don't know, they have been getting more…sexual." The other three turned to Columbus for the umpteenth time that day and it was starting to get on his nerves a bit.

"I watched The Princess and the Frog and some of the lines just made my mind go to wrong places."

"Was Tallahassee there with you in those 'places'?" Wichita grinned as her comment caused Columbus to turn bright red and sputter random words that didn't make any sense put together.

"Someone's tongue tied." The smiles started to fade as the group of four noticed a guy with brown hair and eyes coming towards them.

"Oh, Colby, hi…" Columbus said with fake cheerfulness that Tallahassee didn't miss.

"Hey Columbus; hi everybody else." Nobody missed that the last part of his sentence seemed strained.

"We have names you know. I'm Little Rock, this is my older sister Wichita, and that's Tallahassee." Little Rock found herself desperately wanting to tell this Colby guy that Columbus was Tallahassee's boyfriend, but didn't.

"Ok, thanks Little Rock. My name's Colby Wisconsin" Now Wichita nearly got up and kicked this guy's ass. She had heard his tone, and knew that he was making fun of her younger sister's name. Instead of causing a scene though, she used words as her weapon.

"Find something funny about my younger sister's name Colby Wisconsin?" The words were cold and harsh, and Colby found himself facing three angry looks and one annoyed one. After all if it was one thing Columbus didn't like it was someone making fun of Little Rock.

"No, sorry about that. Anyway, I just stopped to say hi to Columbus. See ya later kid." And then without any warning Colby leaned down and kissed Columbus on the cheek before straightening up and walking away.

Needless to say, Tallahassee wasn't just pissed, he was livid. Wichita and Little Rock were waiting for him to get around Columbus and go kickass on whatever-his-name-is. They were more than disappointed when he didn't. If anything they looked quite depressed.

"Well…that was really awkward."

Of course, leave it to Columbus to get kissed by another guy and think nothing of it. The boy was more than half the time oblivious or in the confines of his own mind.

"Awkward? You thought it was awkward?" Wichita and Little Rock's moods picked up at Tallahassee's words. Something big was coming.

"Really awkward and kind of creepy, and he was looking at me weirdly earlier."

"He was lookin' at you!?" Tallahassee growled and Columbus scooted away from the enraged redneck.

"Y-Yeah, but nothing happened. You showed up before he could try anything."

"Columbus, OUT NOW!" Said boy squeaked as Florida roared and him and got out of the seat, Tallahassee following suit. "We're gonna have us a little talk. Pardon us Wichita, Little Rock." Tallahassee tipped his hat at them before grabbing Columbus' wrist and dragging him away from the area.

Little Rock stood up to follow them only to be pushed back into her seat by Wichita. "Sit down and eat your pizza." At her sister's distraught look Wichita continued. "I'll just get the details from Columbus anyway." Little Rock huffed, but took it anyway. Details were better than nothing at all.

**

* * *

**

Tallahassee on the other hand had dragged Columbus to the parking lot where practically nobody was and few cars remained. He only let go of Columbus when they were by their bright yellow Hummer.

After that though, Tallahassee didn't say much, just seemed to be pacing while muttering some not-so-nice words under his breath.

"Florida?" Nothing. "Did I do something wrong?" Oops, wrong words. Tallahassee turned so he was facing Columbus, his bright blue eyes strongly illuminated in the night.

"You stupid ass spit-fuck!"

"Language." The word was out before Columbus could stop it and said boy felt slightly sick as he was slammed against one of the side doors of the Hummer.

"I can't believe you. Here I am tryin' to be serious and your worried about my language!?"

Columbus didn't say anything and didn't try to move. He was pinned with the car behind him and Tallahassee in front. His wrists were on either side of his head being held there by Tallahassee. Somewhere in the back of his mind he thought that this was probably where the expression 'trapped between a rock and a hard place' came in.

"Nothin' to say? Good, I'll talk then. You are a stupid little spit-fuck. You let that guy close to you and didn't even notice anything about him!"

"Well I don't like him if that's what you're implying!"

"It's not!"

"Then fucking tell me what's wrong! I know you're possessive but you never get jealous!"

"Well maybe I am!" Using his rage as a fuel source he pulled Columbus closer and kissed him. Columbus gasped and Tallahassee used the time to slip his tongue into Columbus' mouth and dominating it in one fell swoop.

It only took a little while into their make-out session for Columbus to release one of his half-whimper, half-moan noises that drove Tallahassee crazy, and made him pull back.

Columbus whined at the loss and stared at Tallahassee with those dark green eyes showing want and confusion.

"You need to understand how jealous I am." Was the only response he got before being pinned to the Hummer again in the same position as before.

Tallahassee didn't wait to kiss Columbus again, their tongues getting in a battle that Columbus was only too happy to lose. He liked being dominated by Tallahassee after all.

They pulled apart for air once more and Columbus was surprised when Tallahassee ran his tongue across his cheek. "I'm jealous that you let another guy, other than me kiss you." Columbus shivered as Florida's tongue ran down the side of his neck. This caused a tingling feeling in his stomach when he felt that tongue lick the sensitive area between his collarbone and neck.

"I'm jealous that you let another guy touch you like he did." The college student let out a breathily moan as his partner bit down on the soft skin and gently sucked on it. That was definitely going to mark.

He released the skin and removed one of the hands pinning Columbus' wrist so that it could slip underneath Columbus' hoodie and T-shirt. Said boy gasped as Tallahassee's slightly cold hands hit feverish feeling skin.

"I'm especially jealous though that he looked at you in a way he 'ought not to be lookin' at you." The hand moved further up to tweak one of Ohio's nipples causing the boy to arch against Tallahassee, a soft moan making its way out of his mouth. A mouth which was soon covered by a certain backwater hick's.

Tallahassee released Columbus' other wrist and now that the boy had both arms free, wrapped them around Tallahassee's neck. He felt the hand that had been holding his wrist tug at the waste of his jeans and he nearly told Tallahassee to stop being such a slow tease and to hurry up and fuck him already, but he didn't.

That was probably because his name was being called.

The older college student growled at the interruption. "God damn mother fucker, I'm gonna kill him."

Because walking towards them was Colby. How he didn't notice that the two were tangled in one another was a rarity in itself. The two had managed to separate by now in hopes that nothing appeared off, but they were wrong.

As Colby approached he took sight of Columbus' slightly bruised lips and tussled clothes. He also took notice of who was standing beside Columbus and felt his temper rise.

"So, you two are together…or are you guys just fuck buddies?" (9)

"No, we are not fuck buddies for your information. He's **my** boyfriend." Columbus' breath hitched as he heard the word come from Tallahassee's lips. He knew that Tallahassee thought it made him sound gay and had never heard it used in public to describe Columbus.

But, against someone who was a threat to what was his, Tallahassee had decided to use the word.

It seems to work as a look of spite takes over Wisconsin's face, and he glowers at Tallahassee.

"Is that so… I honestly don't see what Columbus sees in you." Florida's eyes narrow and he pulls Columbus closer to him.

"'Probly more than he sees in you."

Colby makes a sound that sounds like a snarl to the comment. Columbus knows this is going to end badly, but some dark part inside of him want to see Tallahassee kick this other guy's ass.

"Yeah, because a jealous, possessive, irresponsible, and backwater hick is exactly what the kid wants right?" The sarcasm drips off of his words, but Columbus isn't even paying attention to the fight right now.

He's too far lost to his anger to do anything else. After all, just as Tallahassee didn't let anybody but him insult Columbus it was the same way for him. Nobody but him was allowed to call Tallahassee a backwater hick while he was around.

So when he walks up to Colby everybody is surprised except him. When he actually slams his fist into Wisconsin's face, hearing the crunch as bone in the nose breaks, he is slightly surprised, but the remaining anger stops him from being totally confused.

It however doesn't stop the pain in his knuckles from being registered. The stinging sensation causes him to hiss and shake his hand.

"Wha da hell waz zat fur!?" Comes the muffled voice from Colby, who is on the ground holding his bleeding nose.

"Nobody insults Tallahassee except me. Well, actually Wichita and Little Rock can insult him minorly, but nobody else." He knew that he probably should have sounded a lot more threatening, but he really couldn't with the amount of pain in his hand. It was definitely going to bruise.

What he wasn't expecting though was for a hand to shoot out and grab his leg, effectively sending him falling onto hard concrete. Columbus groaned as his back hit the hard pavement and was vaguely aware of Colby climbing on top of him, arm pulled back to hit him.

Before the fist could even make contact though Tallahassee had barreled into him and the two fought in a mess of tangled limbs and snarls. Florida though, was better at this kind of thing and soon had Colby beneath him and was beating the living daylights out of him.

As unfortunate as it was though, Columbus knew he would have to get Tallahassee off of the other male. The only problem was how to do it. Tallahassee was pure muscle while he was…well kind of not. And right now there was only one way he could think would work.

Sucking up his nervousness Columbus walked up behind Tallahassee and wrapped one arm around the redneck's waste while his other hand went to Tallahassee's crotch and squeezed.

The effect was instantaneous. All movement stopped for a split second before all in one graceful movement Tallahassee got off Wisconsin, spun around, and kissed Columbus heatedly.

"Car, now, we're goin' home."

"What about Wichita and Little Rock?" Tallahassee rolled his eyes and started pushing Columbus towards the Hummer.

"They drove here by themselves, let them drive themselves home. Just call them and tell them were goin' home."

Columbus pulled out his phone and dialed Wichita's number. "Hi it's me. Sorry, Tallahassee wants to go home. I'll be sure to do that." Columbus stopped and turned to Tallahassee. "Wichita wants to talk to you."

Florida looked skeptical but took the phone either way. "Hello. Well that's great that Lil' Rock wants to play another round of laser tag. Now why would I wanna do that when I can go home and… Hey, that's not a bad idea. Alright we'll meet you there." Tallahassee hung up the phone.

"What's going on?"

"Wichita and Little Rock want to play laser tag with us." Now Tallahassee was leading him back to the game place.

"Wait, we're going to go play laser tag?" Now Columbus was just confused. First Tallahassee wanted to fuck him, then he wanted to play laser tag? It didn't make any sense.

"No, Wichita and Little Rock are goin' ta' play laser tag, we'll be in there, but we won't be doin' any playin', catch my drift?" Columbus' face turned bright red at what Tallahassee was implying.

"But uh, won't we be disturbing them?"

"Nobody said we had ta' play on the same floor as them." Columbus internally debated the subject before giving in. If Tallahassee wanted to fuck him during a game of laser tag, who was he to complain? People had always told him it was good to try new things.

Though, in a way he didn't think that this was what they had in mind.

* * *

Man, ok, I have a ton of footnotes to get through, so you guys just stay frosty while I get through them.

1. Free cookies to whoever can guess who this guy is. Yes, he's from Z-Land.

2. This line basically gives number 1 up. It's practically the same thing he said in the movie.

3. Yes, I had to throw in a Silent Hill reference.

4. Yes, I borrowed this from **A Kiss For A Kill**.

5. Just a hint for the rewrite of my Silent Hill chapter that will be coming out whenever I deem it good enough to.

6. Thank **A Kiss For A Kill **for this. She's the one that found out.

7. I nearly shot myself when I wrote that line. I have a weird belief that every name has power (I watched xxxHolic and the bat episode has inspired this belief) so I was like "Must write...though contradicting...beliefs."

8. I had this conversation with my girlfriend and a couple of other friends.

9. Why do I have the feeling that I've used this line before?

Ok, that's it. Whoo. Ok...uh I really don't have anything else to say. Nope, nothing uh...so yeah... Review please? I think that's it though.

~Kara


	16. Anatomy

Wow, it's been a long time since I updated, and I offer my sincerest apologies on that. It's senior year kicking my ass though, but I was able to come back!

To all the people that read, reviewed, favorited, and alerted I will thank you all next chapter! Unfortunatly, I haven't even been able to get to everyone or send many replies so I'm hoping to get on that ASAP!

Anyway, without further wait I present chapter 16 to you fine folks! Oh! And I owe nothing except the plotline!

* * *

Chapter 16: Anatomy

When Columbus had asked Tallahassee to study with him for his high school anatomy exam, he meant they should actually study. Tallahassee on the other hand, had thought it had meant a different kind of studying.

Needless to say, he was quite disappointed when he found out that they would actually be studying.

"How many cervical vertebrae are there?" He droned robotically while sitting off to the side of Columbus's bed staring at the color coded sheet that Columbus had shoved into his hand when he had agreed.

"Seven. There are also twelve thoracic, and five lumbar." Columbus replied automatically. He was currently on his stomach, staring at his anatomy textbook and attempting to memorize the muscles.

"Whoopie, you got it, how excitin'." He grumbled while picking at white fuzz from the carpet.

"We can always start on the muscles…" The teen spoke with a hint of caution at Tallahassee's boredom, which he mistook as irritation. They had been over the bones of the human body over ten times by now.

Tallahassee stood from his spot on the floor and stretched, feeling several pops from his joints. Columbus, taking this a sign that his boyfriend was probably leaving, turned back to his textbook. He was lucky that he only had to know the bones of the body and the back muscles otherwise he was certain that his head would have exploded by then.

The green eyed teen was about to begin quizzing himself once more when he heard the door shut and groaned, his head thunking on his textbook as he let it fall. This truly was boring to him and just having the older man around had made it much more exciting.

Wearily, he dragged his head from the text and mentally prepared himself for the torture that was the muscles when he felt a slight weight on him.

Quickly thinking that a rat or maybe a raccoon had somehow gotten into his room, the neurotic teen tensed up.

"Trapezius." Columbus almost jumped when he heard Tallahassee's voice in his left ear.

"W-What?"

He felt hands trail up the back of his shirt to his shoulders and slowly trace in a diagonal fashion down to his spine all while the hick above him ghosted the word into his ear once more, causing a shiver of want to tingle his spine.

"Talla, I really need to study." Was all he was able to choke out.

"We are." Came the simple reply before hands trailed down his spine. "Twelve thoracic and five lumbar right?" The words were hot against the younger boy's ear and he felt a pool of fire start to rise in his belly.

"Right?" The word came again as the hands trailed down his spine once more, causing Columbus to release a choked out confirmation. "Good boy. Now, coccyx and sacrum right?" The Floridan asked while gently sliding a find in a line starting where the vertebrae ended and finishing right at the start of his jeans.

The slightly tongue tied boy was barely able to get out his sentence "N-No, it's the sacrum then coccyx."

"Whoops," came the voice from near his neck and Columbus felt hands slide his shirt up. "Must have accidentally gotten them mixed up." And he had to stop himself from arching as the sex god above him licked a trail in the exact same area that his fingers had been moments before.

"Now, what's this muscle called?" Tallahassee was once again by his neck, nibbling a small trail down it, but his hands were firmly groping Ohio's ass.

"Gluteus Maximus" was quickly breathed out as he could feel one hand start to slide under his jeans. Tallahassee smirked against the base of Columbus's neck before biting down on it causing his Collie to whimper like the bitch he was.

"And this?" Columbus could no longer hold back the moan that he released when Tallahassee stroked his entrance, causing the hick to chuckle. "I'm pretty sure you'll learn much more anatomy this way, don't ya think so Collie?" Columbus could practically see the sparkle of lust in Florida's azure eyes as the words we're muttered causing him to agree. "Don't worry, you'll learn **a lot**, I can promise you that one spit-fuck."

Columbus passed his test the next day with over a one-hundred.

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Well, how was it for so long not writing? I decided to give you guys something special and was really thinking about making this a lemon, but didn't know what you fine folks would have thought about that.

And I actually love anatomy, it's my favorite class and we just finished dissecting cats so nudge nudge to all you great fans out there. :)

~Peace, Love, Stoli, and La Vie Boheme!


	17. Vengeance

Hello Readers! What's up all of my friends? I hope you enjoyed the last chapter as much as I did. Now, I know I was totally supposed to upload a chapter before the end, but I ended up not being able to finish it, so here's one to tide you over until then.

Also, because this is a very short chapter I will do all the thanks now!

To my fabulous Story Alerters!: **Leelu's skittles, The Truth's Lie, DayDreamNinja, DualKitsune, KairiSama21, Critical Blitz, Aiedail Choupette, Yatsuki, ..342, Silver Melody217, faithless1313, Eternalfiresong, KiraSparrow, nanamb, omgchocolate, sniperplushy, Tenshi no Mugen, Xan Salstone, bluerose24, XBlackHeartedBitchX, LoneWolfie, The Plot Bunny Whisperer, yaoiislife, TrinityYoru, An Uchiha Black, KairaiGensou, music-is-luv, Yami Ryo, johnnydepp02, shampoo147, LokiWaterDraca, camarts13, Darknessa DarkClaw, neverlife, creativeamber, Maniakku Otaku Saku, Morbid Crow, Raifu no Tenshi, Sir Spamalots, Heart's Love, Kazeren, Scotlanddreamer, and My-Emo-Sunshine.**

To my awesome Story Favoriters!: **KairiSama21, BlackRain-BlackBlood, Aiedail Choupette, ..342, shadowkat121, blackbloodywolf, KiraSparrow, nanamb, omgchocolate, inutana, KittenKez, Tenshi no Mugen, Xan Salstone, XBlackHeartedBitchX, YamixYuugiLover, Lone Wolfie, yaoiislife, XSilverliningsX, afallenheart, Sena-kun, Carol J, music-is-luv, Yami Ryo, Icook93, shampoo147, darkroge, That'sABingo5115, Silver Sarra, and My-Emo-Sunshine. **

To my also awesome Authorers Favorite/Alerters!: **.342, random-chick-69, KiraSparrow, Xan Salstone, YamixYuugiLover, XBlackHeartedBitchX, XSilverLiningsX, and afallenheart. **

To my favorite Reviewers!: **Aiedail Choupette, Yatsuki, ..342, YamixYuugiLover, LaylaBinx, kittit24, XBlackHeartedBitchX, ChibiChaos Mage of Chaos, The Plot Bunny Whisperer, afallenheart, shampoo147, darkroge, Ninny-na, Anyminutenow** (OMG I LURVE YOU!), **A Kiss For A Kill, Supporter of Free Love, Cooper Sterling, TheHowlingMoon, Black-Rose 23, Murder Junkie, and ..Love.**

And to my secretive Anon Reviewers! I would really love to reply to you guys!: **ALpein and Drai.**

And man, I've tried to review everyone back, but I think I missed a lot of the people from Laser Tag, so I'll be sending you replies even if I sent them to you before for those Ch. 15 darlings. Just a heads up!

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Chapter 17: Vengeance

Originally, his reason for killing zombies had only been for vengeance.

He had wanted to make them pay for taking away the one thing he had loved most in the world, his son.

His son, whom with his bright blond hair and blue eyes was almost a mirror image of when he was a kid. His son, who would now miss out on many of the great pleasures life had to offer because his ex-wife had gotten bitten and when she changed… well she was now literally a man-eater.

A part of him still felt a deep sorry when he thought about how his kid would never get that childish crush in elementary. He would never combat teenage hormones or have a passion for what he wanted to be. That he would never find that someone or get married.

All of it made him angry beyond belief. So, originally, his reason for killing zombies had only been for vengeance for his son.

Until he had met that stupid, idiotic, neurotic, cute, irritating, and phobic-induced little spit-fuck.

He had, at first, thought that the boy was more like a puppy than anything else. They had a "father and really distant son relationship" at the beginning, until they met Bichita and Little Rock. It was then that he noticed that his relationship with the younger of the two siblings was more fatherly and his relationship with the college student was different. Way different.

"Mother and father" was how Little Rock had called them on more than one occasion. One, probably him, always gearing for a fight and teaching things to her. The other, telling her about safety and educating her on things about the old world.

It hadn't been till a zombie attack had come too close to taking the younger male's life that he realized what their relationship really was.

Now, his original reason for killing zombies, which had only been for vengeance, was quite different. It was now for protection of his fuckable, neurotic, adorable, frustrating, and phobic-induced little spit-fuck, Columbus.

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I hope you all enjoyed that little drabbleish one. I will hopefully be finishing the one I was working on over spring break this week and then present it to you fine people!

~Peace, Love, Stoli, and La Vie Boheme!


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